- The Balladeer: [narrating] And if that ain't trouble enough, them Dukes they'r e gonna get blamed for knocking out the entire Hazzard phone service. Both lines.
- Boss Hogg: And you get ready to paint the General Lee just the moment I win it from Jesse Duke.
- Landis: Any particular color?
- Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Lavender, let's pick lavender. My momma loves lavender.
- Boss Hogg: Well, you're momma won't be drivin'!
- Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Oh.
- Boss Hogg: Will she?
- Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: No, she won't...
- [stammers]
- Boss Hogg: [turns back to Landis and Purcell] Listen, for the first job, I want you to paint that car black, see, and then for each job after that, you just paint it another color of the rainbow!
- Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Like lavender.
- Boss Hogg: Would you just stop all that?
- Boss Hogg: [to Rosco] Just because you saved their car from a fate worse than death, don't mean you gotta shake hands with a Duke every time they come snoopin' around some place.