Due South (TV Series)

White Men Can't Jump to Conclusions (1996)

David Marciano: Detective Ray Vecchio

Quotes 

• Fraser : Detective Vecchio will blow your brains off.

  Ray Vecchio : Out.

  Fraser : Out. I'm sorry, I stand corrected, he will blow your brains out.

• Ray Vecchio : Oh, the judge is gonna love this! "Your Honour, we have no case because the bang is where the bing should've been!"

  Fraser : The sounds don't lie, Ray.

  Ray Vecchio : Okay, so tell me this: how does the bang being where the bing should've been...

  Fraser : No, that's the bing being where the bang should've been.

• Ray Vecchio : Look, Fraser. Kids from that neighbourhood, generally speaking, end up doing one of two things: basketball, or crime.

  Fraser : Tyree plays basketball.

  Ray Vecchio : Well, they all start out playing basketball, and if one of them's lucky enough he'll make it to Division One college ball. But if he's not tall enough, if he's not talented enough, if he's not dedicated enough, he's gonna wind up like that kid and make life miserable for everybody else.

  Fraser : [pulls a piece of thread out of his pocket]  Ray, please, look at this.

  Ray Vecchio : What's that supposed to be, evidence?

  Fraser : The shooter wore this.

  Ray Vecchio : [stares at the thread]  Well, let's hope that's not all he wore.

• Fraser : [Ray is ignoring nearby gunfire]  Ray, that was a gunshot!

  Ray Vecchio : Yeah, if we stop for every gunshot we hear in this neighborhood, we'll never get home.

  [another shot rings out] 

  Ray Vecchio : See?

  Fraser : [drops his boots and runs toward the shots] 

  Ray Vecchio : Aww! I'm off duty!

  [runs after Fraser] 

  Ray Vecchio : YOU'RE off duty! And unless somebody shot a moose, you have no jurisdiction!

• [first lines] 

  Ray Vecchio : This neighbourhood makes yours look like Aster Street.

  Fraser : Well, as I recall, this was your recommendation.

  Ray Vecchio : Link's the best bindlestitch guy in the world. You got a problem with your footwear, you bring it to Link.

  Fraser : I agree. These boots are as good as new. Probably the best $125 I ever parted with.

  Ray Vecchio : You know, that's another thing I'll never understand, why anybody would spend $125 to fix up a stinky old pair of Mountie boots.

  Fraser : Oh, Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray! Properly moulded boots are a Mountie's prized possession. Well, that and his horse.

  Ray Vecchio : Well, we're not picking up your horse.

  Fraser : Well, I don't have a horse.

  Ray Vecchio : Well, you know, you ought to think about getting one, because I'm getting really tired of driving you around.

• Fraser : Good news, Ray. He didn't do it.

  Ray Vecchio : [scoffing]  No, not this time.

  Fraser : Not what this time?

  Ray Vecchio : Look. Someone shot someone, right?

  Fraser : Yes.

  Ray Vecchio : And I have a responsibility to catch that someone that shot the other someone, right?

  Fraser : Yes.

  Ray Vecchio : And if I catch that someone, it's good news, right?

  Fraser : Yes.

  Ray Vecchio : Okay. So if I caught the wrong guy, does that mean that no crime was committed?

  Fraser : No.

  Ray Vecchio : Does it mean that no one was almost killed?

  Fraser : No.

  Ray Vecchio : Does it mean that there is one less bad guy in the world?

  Fraser : No.

  Ray Vecchio : Right. It means that the real bad guy is still out there instead of locked up somewhere safe, so by you coming in here and telling me that our guy is innocent, this is just not good news!

  Fraser : I'm sorry. I see what you're driving at, and I stand corrected. It is *bad* news. He didn't do it.

• [last lines] 

  Ray Vecchio : All right, Tyree, I spoke to the State's Attorney and she's considering dropping the charges. How you doing?

  [stops short as it hits him] 

  Isiah Thomas : Isiah. How you doin'?

  Ray Vecchio : [suddenly giddy]  Yeah, I know who you are! Ray Vecchio!

  Isiah Thomas : So are we gonna play today, or what?

  Ray Vecchio : Well, yeah! Gimme the ball!

  [Ray and Tyree run for the court] 

  Isiah Thomas : Mountie, right?

  Fraser : That's correct, Mr. Isiah.

  Isiah Thomas : You know, I was wondering, since I'm in Toronto now...

  Fraser : Oh, uh, we mount the horses. You play basketball?

  [Isiah laughs] 

• Fraser : Ray, please, just try to remember. The sounds are all stored in here, so just clear your mind. Imagine... imagine you're on an ice floe, thousands of miles away from any conceivable distraction.

  Ray Vecchio : Is this an Eskimo trick?

  Fraser : No. Inuit. Close your eyes. Close your eyes. All right, now put yourself back at that moment. What do you hear?

  Ray Vecchio : The entire Chicago Police Department laughing at me?

  Fraser : Ray, please, humour me.

  Ray Vecchio : All right, all right.