The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)

No Rice at My Wedding (1965)

Ann Morgan Guilbert: Millie Crumberbacher

Quotes 

• Millie Crumberbacher : Laura, did he almost kiss you?

  Laura Meehan : Worse. I almost kissed HIM.

  Millie Crumberbacher : Ooo, can I have Rob?

• [Millie tries to help Laura decide between Clark and Rob through a point system] 

  Laura Meehan : Clark wants to be a lawyer.

  Millie Crumberbacher : Ooo, a lawyer. That's very good. That's another ten points. And Rob wants to be a comedy writer - which no one knows how to be one, so he'll be struggling and starving and probably never make it - so we'll give him one point.

  Laura Meehan : Millie, you're pushing Clark.

  Millie Crumberbacher : I am not. Well, the score is twenty to eight in his favor, you know. I didn't make these numbers up!

  Laura Meehan : Yes, you did!

• [Rob mistakenly kisses Millie] 

  Rob Petrie : Millie, what're you doin' here?

  Millie Crumberbacher : I forget. Ooo, I didn't give you enough points!