Dallas (TV Series)

Hell Hath No Fury (1983)

Larry Hagman: J.R. Ewing

Quotes 

• J.R. Ewing : Well, hello, Clayton. Come to take Mama out?

  Clayton Farlow : Yes. We're going out to dinner.

  Sue Ellen Ewing : Uh, she should be down in a minute. Oh, excuse me, I'm sorry. Clayton Farlow, Roy Ralston.

  Roy Ralston : How do you do?

  [shakes Clayton's hand] 

  Clayton Farlow : Oh, yeah, you're the fellow who has the talk show J.R.'s on.

  Roy Ralston : Yes, I do. I'm sure you share my enthusiasm for J.R.'s appearances on my show.

  Clayton Farlow : Not really.

  Roy Ralston : Well, J.R.'s becoming a champion of the underdog. I have a feeling he'll be leaving for Washington, uh, after the next election.

  Clayton Farlow : Well, Dallas' gain will be Washington's loss.

• Katherine Wentworth : You know, Bobby has that deal with McLeish Canada?

  J.R. Ewing : Yeah. Yeah. I've been praying to the snow god for a very cold winter.

• J.R. Ewing : [re Holly flirting with him]  Well, I admire your taste, my dear. I also remember a pistol big as a cannon pointed right between my eyes.

  Holly Harwood : [laughs]  I've put away my gun.

• J.R. Ewing : Katherine, if Bobby loses, Pam just might take pity on him. She might want a reconciliation. And if I lose, Bobby takes over, their marriage is finished for good.

  Katherine Wentworth : Is that the way you see it?

  J.R. Ewing : Don't you? If you want Bobby...

  Katherine Wentworth : [abashedly]  Who said I want Bobby?

  J.R. Ewing : If you want Bobby, you better move fast while this contest for Ewing Oil is still on. And I win.

  Katherine Wentworth : Well, J.R.

  [raises her glass] 

  Katherine Wentworth : Here's to winners.

  J.R. Ewing : I'll drink to that.

  [clink glasses] 

• J.R. Ewing : You say that with all the enthusiasm of a wildcatter drilling dust!

• J.R. Ewing : Government is big business. The biggest. They're in the police business and the land management business, and health, education business. All those bureaus are just departments of one big department store.

• Roy Ralston : J.R., as a capitalist and a businessman, how could you find anything in common with Cuba's communists?

  J.R. Ewing : Roy, I honestly don't know. But I'd like the opportunity to find out. And who knows, we might come up with a deal that would be profitable for both sides.