Dallas (TV Series)

Divorce, Ewing Style (1980)

Larry Hagman: J.R. Ewing

Quotes 

• J.R. Ewing : How dare you have a private detective follow me!

  Sue Ellen Ewing : Why J.R., you're getting positively paranoid.

• J.R. Ewing : [entering apartment]  Hi.

  Kristin Shepard : Well... I thought maybe you'd died.

  J.R. Ewing : Oh?

  [chuckles:] 

  J.R. Ewing : Well... no such luck, huh?

  Kristin Shepard : Did your new secretary tell you I called... all day?

  J.R. Ewing : [fixing himself a drink]  Yeah, she did. You know, that could get to be an annoying habit to get into, Kristin.

  Kristin Shepard : Well, why didn't you call me back?

  J.R. Ewing : [weary sigh]  Kristin, I just came by for a quiet drink and to see you, honey. If I want screamin' and yellin', I can go home for that.

• Serena Wald : [in lavishly decorated lounge]  Do you have to leave so soon?

  J.R. Ewing : [fixing tie in front of ornate mirror]  Well, I wouldn't wanna overstay my welcome.

  Serena Wald : [pours him a drink]  You know, you're different from most of my... friends.

  J.R. Ewing : Oh, how's that?

  Serena Wald : [hands him the drink]  Well, you're the only one that hasn't offered to take me away from all this. Set me up in a place of our own.

  J.R. Ewing : Take you away from all this...? Honey, you... you got a good deal here.

  [finishes drink in one gulp] 

  J.R. Ewing : Tax-free too.

  Serena Wald : If you did set me up, it would probably save you money in the long run.

  J.R. Ewing : [scoffs, returns glass]  Don't push it, or there may not be a long run.

  [takes out lots of money] 

  J.R. Ewing : Well, I like everything just the way it is. Cash and carry.

  [drops money into that wine glass] 

  Serena Wald : [with irony]  You certainly know how to say all the right things.

  J.R. Ewing : [chuckles]  Yeah. Like you said, I'm different.

  [leaves] 

• J.R. Ewing : Up till now I've been understanding. I've put up with Sue Ellen's fooling around. I've tried to be a good husband and a father. And look how she pays me back. Just look.

  Kristin Shepard : Why don't you just divorce her and be done with it?

  J.R. Ewing : 'Cause she's not gonna settle just for a simple divorce. She wants to take my son away from me. And with what she has on me now, divorce could be a little bit messy. And Daddy and Mama don't need to read any more headlines, that's for sure.

  Kristin Shepard : Well, I don't see what choices you have.

  J.R. Ewing : Well, Kristin, I was thinking about that on the way over here. I've got to get Sue Ellen back in that sanitarium. Gotta get her locked up for good.

  Kristin Shepard : But how? She doesn't drink anymore.

  J.R. Ewing : Well, maybe we could get her starting up again. Or at least convince everybody she started again. And I might need your help for it, honey.

  Kristin Shepard : You know I'd do anything for you, J.R. I always have, haven't I?

  J.R. Ewing : And I've always showed you my appreciation, haven't I?

  Kristin Shepard : But... this time, I want more. If this works, I want you to divorce Sue Ellen. I want to be Mrs. J.R. Ewing.