The Closer (TV Series)

Standards and Practices (2005)

Kyra Sedgwick: Brenda Leigh Johnson

Quotes 

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : I'd like to start with you, Ms. Powell. I'd like to say how sorry I am that I was unable to ignore your general level of incompetence in the wrongly obtained conviction in the case of Bill Croelick. And I'm sorry if you felt hurt and defensive about putting a man on death row for the wrong crime and I certainly hope that that will never ever happen again. Agent Jackson, I, I deeply regret that the FBI handed over two million dollars to a man on a terrorist watch list without the capacity to trace it, or managed to follow him for months without knowing his wife was having an affair with the doctor. And I hope you do much better in the future. Captain Taylor, I suppose I should apologize to you for not having been born in Los Angeles, but, having seen your work up close now for several months, I can honestly say that, try as I might, I can't think of *any* fair and reasonable system on Earth where I wouldn't outrank you. There, I hope that clears everything up. Well, excuse me, I mean, uh, I have to go. Thank you very much, Thank you.

  Will Pope : Well.

  [Clears throat] 

  Will Pope : she did say she was sorry.

  [laughing] 

  Will Pope : I'm sorry. Of course, this is - this is terrible. Terrible.

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : Lieutenant Flynn... Your resignation surprised me most of all. The whole time I've been here you've never said one complimentary thing about or to me.

  Det. Andy Flynn : Chief, you have really great legs.

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : So you both work for the Pruitts?

  Gardener #1 : Yes.

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : And were you working at the Pruitt's house two evenings ago?

  Gardener #1 : Yes.

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : And did you climb Mount Everest in your underpants?

  Gardener #1 : Yes.

  Detective Julio Sanchez : Maybe this would go a little quicker if I handled it, Chief.

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : You think?

  Detective Julio Sanchez : Yes.

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : I speak German, Russian, and I'm fully conversant in Czech. And I have to move to the one city where half the people are from Latin America.

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : I have a waffle iron?

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : And, Lieutenant Provenza...

  Louie Provenza : Yes, ma'am.

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : I need this hurried to S.I.D. in about two shakes of a lamb's tail. Thank you so very much. And keep it taped off, ladies and gentlemen. Because until we understand things better...

  Louie Provenza : [imitating Brenda, in a serious manner]  Uh, this is a crime scene, y'all.

• Louie Provenza : [imitating Brenda]  Lieutenant Flynn, see if this bottle has any prints on it other than the ones belongin' to our big-time Hollywood producer here. Thank yew!

  [Flynn laughs] 

  Louie Provenza : Yoo-hoo! Detective Sanchez, yoo-hoo, uh, would you ask S.I.D. to come down here for one little second. Oh, and, detective Daniels, I want to talk to the neighbor who called this in. Thank you. Lieutenant Tao, grab your abacas and see if y'all can figure out the time of death.

  [the detectives are all laughing] 

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : [appears behind him]  Thank yew, Lieutenant! Those are all excellent ideas.