- Shirley Schmidt: Oh, by all means, let's get a fair trial for the man who tried to slit my throat.
- Alan Shore: Let's.
- Shirley Schmidt: But understand that everyone in this firm is concidered a witness. Don't expect anyone to help you, or speak to you.
- Alan Shore: And won't that make for a refreshing change.
- Daniel Post: Daniel Post.
- Denny Crane: Denny Crane.
- Daniel Post: I'm a client.
- Denny Crane: I'm a partner.
- Daniel Post: C.E.O., Kreisberg-Pellum.
- Denny Crane: My name's on the door.
- Daniel Post: I love the offices.
- Denny Crane: Thank you. I love your hair.
- Daniel Post: I got a plane.
- Denny Crane: Indeed?
- Daniel Post: Could use a little more color, though.
- Denny Crane: I'll make a note. My fiancée sells office furniture.
- Daniel Post: Congratulations, I'd love to meet her.
- Denny Crane: My club, Thursdays. They serve Reubens.
- Daniel Post: I'll take you flying. Oh, by the way, I'd like to try a case, with Ms. Bauer over here.
- Denny Crane: Why not? See you Thursday.
- Daniel Post: Thursday.
- Shirley Schmidt: Hello Garrett. You're not helping Mr. Shore on the Espenson case, because you're a witness. I'm sure you're aware that would be a conflict of interest.
- Garrett Wells: I was just getting him coffee.
- Shirley Schmidt: Well, you can't do that, either. I'll take a decaf, though. Thanks.
- Garrett Wells: [quietly as he exits] Thank you.
- Alan Shore: Shirley, I know we're fighting, but there's no reason to take it out on the children.
- Beverly Bridge: I know what you want, Shirley. And yes, Denny does still talk about you. He remembers his experiences with you so fondly. Did you know that he has a position called "The Schmidt"?
- Shirley Schmidt: Would that be the one where I read a magazine while he lies passed out on the floor?
- Beverly Bridge: That's not what I heard.