- Mitch Buchannon: [voice-over] The difference between being a lifeguard and a private eye is that a lifeguard has to spot trouble and respond. Private eye gets hired by someone who's already in trouble. Either way, a stranger's life is suddenly in your hands. Unfortunately, private eyes can't always spot the victims as easily as lifeguards.
- Garner Ellerbee: [Willie Logan has just exited the office after hiring the firm to find his "dad." He's lied about his mother] Huh. She's sick. In bed.
- Ryan McBride: At Auntie Em's house.
- Mitch Buchannon: This isn't Kansas, Toto.
- Garner Ellerbee: Hurry on down to Merv's Car Town, one oh five...
- Ryan McBride: South Firestone, yeah. What's the deal?
- Garner Ellerbee: Bogus little booger.
- Ryan McBride: [as they chase Willie] Don't let him get away!
- Mitch Buchannon: I'm not letting him, he's doing it all by himself!
- Ryan McBride: [She and Mitch pause before leaving the Child Protective Services office] You know, may I just...
- Mitch Buchannon: Be my guest.
- Ryan McBride: hank you.
- [They turn back to Miss Belda, the CPS agent]
- Ryan McBride: The child is not just a burdensome case file, nor is he troublesome. He's just a scared little boy that got lost in a bad shuffle. And he, along with everyone else on the planet, except for you, wants to be loved by everybody else. Am I done?
- Mitch Buchannon: Doesn't feel like it.
- Ryan McBride: Mm. You, Miss Belda, are a sourpussed, constipated, and I hope that is your only excuse for acting like this, butthead.
- Mitch Buchannon: There. All done.
- Mitch Buchannon: [searching a dark tunnel for Ryan and Willie] Flashlights always remind me of that movie, E.T. Remember? The guy with the keys in the woods?
- Garner Ellerbee: Ugh, don't talk about movies.
- Mitch Buchannon: Why not?
- Garner Ellerbee: 'Cause I just saw Jurassic Park. Scared me to death.
- Mitch Buchannon: Jurassic Park's not a scary movie. Invasion of the Body Snatchers, that's a scary movie.
- Garner Ellerbee: Will you stop talking about scary movies?
- Mitch Buchannon: What are you, scared?
- Garner Ellerbee: I'm not scared. I'm trying to focus on a calm place, a babbling brook, a park or something.
- Mitch Buchannon: Jurassic Park.