- Judge Frances MacKenzie: How do you plead?
- Archie: Guilty with an explanation.
- Judge Frances MacKenzie: What's the explanation?
- Archie: I ain't guilty.
- Archie: [Archie, muttering to Edith while awaiting Judge McKenzie to enter] This guy McKenzie - he probably had a bad night, and a lousy breakfast and sufferin' from hemorrhoods. Ninety days in the clink for sure.
- [the Judge turns out to be a middle-aged black woman]
- Archie: Holy Cow, it's the rock pile for me.
- Judge Frances MacKenzie: Mrs. Bunker, you're out of order.
- Archie Bunker: No, she ain't pregnant. Just my daughter.
- Officer Gorsky: Now you say the suspect was Caucasian?
- Archie Bunker: No, he was white. Well he could've had some colored mixed in him the way things are now adays. Yeah, he could've been one of them macaroons.