Employee of the Month (2006)
Andy Dick: Lon
Photos
Quotes
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Attractive Woman : Are you staring at my breasts?
Lon : I don't know.
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Lon : Wow, that's gotta hurt. I mean, he's always doin' that to you. Stealing your thunder. You remember the red head? In gardening? Boinked her behind the monkey grass. And the asian in automotive? Did her on a pile of carburetors. Oh, and the blonde in frozen foods, with the... Doink! Doink! Turkeys done! Remember her?
[Lon sticks his fingers out of his chest]
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Lon : What the fuck?
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Russell : Think about it guys, we could be working over there at Maxi-Mart and that place really sucks. Pass me the chips there, eight balls.
[Iqbal passes a bulk size bag of chips]
Lon : Plus, I hear they make you wear those house-arrest ankle bracelet things, so they know where you are all the time and if you leave the main floor, you get a little shocker.
[Lon blows a party kazoo]
Russell : True. I knew a guy in upper management, man, went crazy. Strapped one of those things around his hairy ballsack, ran out in the parking lot and blew a three dollar Hawaiian wonder cooler all over the place.
Iqbal : Ids-kay, ids-kay.
Russell : Knocked the little Korean kid right out of shopping basket.