- Willis: Who's Cerberus?
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: Didn't any of you take mythology in seventh grade?
- Burke: Willis never got passed the seventh grade.
- Willis: [sarcastically] Ha...
- Zach Gaines: [Crawling down a slimy, tight dark tunnel where some bats might have passed. Stops up and looks at his dirty arm] Is that mud or bat-crap?
- [Smells his arm]
- Zach Gaines: I hate mud!
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: [They have just escaped being eaten by Cerberus] Can I make a suggestion?
- Jake Addams: Please! Hell, I'm open to just about anything at this point
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: Next time, can we please do things my way instead of the old fashion way?
- Burke: [Points at Samantha] Yeah, gets my vote.
- Jake Addams: What is this, a democracy?
- Burke: It's a dictatorship, sir. Of a 3-headed, mean ass, bad breath dog! Now, unless you got a better idea, I say we take her advice.
- Jake Addams: [about Cerberus] It's gotta have a weakness.
- [Turns to Samantha]
- Jake Addams: Think hard, professor. Are you absolutely sure there's nothing else we can use to fight this thing?
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: At this point, I'm not sure of anything. I mean, all I know of Cerberus is what I've read in books!
- Jake Addams: Well, has anyone ever beaten him in the books?
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: There was Heracles who defeated Cerberus using his bear hands, but he was the son of a God!
- Jake Addams: Next option!
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: Well... there's Orpheus, of course.
- Zach Gaines: [Looks up] Of course.
- [pause]
- Zach Gaines: Who the hell is Orpheus?
- Dr. Samantha Gaines: He put Cerberus to sleep using a lyre.
- Jake Addams: [Sarcastic] Now all we have to do is find a lyre!