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IMDb > "Two and a Half Men" (2003)
"Two and a Half Men"
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"Two and a Half Men" (2003)

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Episodes Rated by IMDb User Rating

Rated Episodes

# Episode User
Rating		 User
Votes

1.0  Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal: Original Pilot 8.3 28
1.1  Pilot 8.0 68
5.12  A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh 7.8 17
3.7  Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop 7.8 35
3.12  That Special Tug 7.7 27
1.12  Camel Filters and Pheremones 7.7 97
3.6  Hi, Mr. Horned One 7.6 33
4.6  Apologies for the Frivolity 7.6 49
4.11  Walnuts and Demerol 7.6 40
5.8  Is There a Mrs. Waffles? 7.6 22
4.24  Prostitutes and Gelato 7.5 34
3.16  Ergo, the Booty Call 7.5 34
4.15  My Damn Stalker 7.5 48
2.23  Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab 7.5 43
4.23  Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin 7.5 41
3.8  That Voodoo That I Do Do 7.5 29
5.10  Kinda Like Necrophilia 7.5 31
1.7  If They Do Go Either Way They're Usually Fake 7.4 42
5.17  Fish in a Drawer 7.4 39
5.16  Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty 7.4 15
2.10  The Salmon Under My Sweater 7.4 32
3.3  Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark 7.4 24
3.11  Santa's Village of the Damned 7.4 31
2.17  Woo-Hoo, a Hernia-Exam! 7.3 35
1.23  Just Like Buffalo 7.3 36
3.17  The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer 7.3 24
5.1  Large Birds, Spiders and Mom 7.3 29
3.9  Madame and Her Special Friend 7.3 29
5.13  The Soil is Moist 7.3 18
3.14  Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded 7.3 28
2.3  A Bag Full of Jawea 7.3 39
5.5  Putting Swim Fins on a Cat 7.3 15
4.19  Smooth as a Ken Doll 7.3 43
5.6  Help Daddy Find His Toenail 7.2 19
3.24  That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite 7.2 39
5.15  Rough Night in Hump Junction 7.2 17
2.13  Zejdz Zmoich Wlosow 7.2 28
1.21  No Sniffing, No Wowing 7.2 35
5.4  City of Great Racks 7.2 17
1.4  If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap 7.1 45
1.24  Can You Feel My Finger 7.1 32
5.3  Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo 7.1 18
1.10  Merry Thanksgiving 7.1 46
3.5  We Called It Mr. Pinky 7.1 21
4.17  I Merely Slept with a Commie 7.1 34
2.24  Does Something Smell Funny to You 7.1 29
3.15  My Tongue Is Meat 7.1 26
4.7  Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head 7.1 30
1.2  Big Flappy Bastards 7.1 39
5.7  The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room 7.1 18
3.2  Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover 7.1 24
2.9  Yes, Monsignor 7.1 35
4.2  Who's Vod Kanockers 7.1 38
3.4  Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs 7.0 22
2.6  The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance 7.0 30
1.5  The Last Thing You Want to Do Is Wind Up with a Hump 7.0 35
3.10  Something Salted and Twisted 7.0 18
2.16  Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth? 7.0 25
1.17  Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats 7.0 26
2.12  A Lung Full of Alan 7.0 32
2.5  Bad News from the Clinic 7.0 39
1.9  Phase One, Complete 6.9 31
-  Jake Comes of Age 6.9 34
5.11  Meander to Your Dander 6.9 20
4.13  Don't Worry, Speed Racer 6.9 39
1.19  I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You 6.9 42
4.1  Working for Caligula 6.9 41
4.3  The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress 6.9 35
1.22  My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet 6.8 31
4.10  Kissing Abraham Lincoln 6.8 30
2.8  Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers 6.8 26
5.2  Media Room Slash Dungeon 6.8 24
1.3  Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell 6.8 43
3.23  Arguments for the Quickie 6.8 32
3.20  Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro 6.8 38
2.20  I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey 6.8 29
2.1  Back Off Mary Poppins 6.8 62
4.16  Young People Have Phlegm Too 6.8 35
2.2  Enjoy Those Garlic Balls 6.8 37
2.11  Last Chance to See Those Tattoos 6.8 33
3.1  Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts 6.7 19
1.8  Twenty-five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful 6.7 31
2.14  Those Big Pink Things with Coconut 6.7 24
4.18  It Never Rains in Hooterville 6.7 36
1.16  That Was Saliva, Alan 6.7 36
2.22  That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother 6.7 16
5.9  Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids 6.7 19
4.8  Release the Dogs 6.7 32
5.14  Winky-Dink Time 6.7 22
3.19  Golly Moses, She's a Muffin 6.7 26
1.18  An Old Flame with a New Wick 6.7 41
2.4  Go Get Mommy's Bra 6.6 28
2.21  A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On 6.6 19
4.5  A Live Woman of Proven Fertility 6.6 44
3.18  The Spit-Covered Cobbler 6.6 22
2.18  It Was Mame, Mom 6.6 38
1.13  Sara Like Puny Alan 6.6 30
1.6  Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? 6.6 38
4.20  Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot 6.6 39
3.13  Humiliation Is a Visual Medium 6.6 26
1.15  Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick 6.6 39
1.14  I Can't Afford Hyenas 6.6 33
2.19  A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise 6.6 22
2.15  Smell the Umbrella Stand 6.6 20
4.21  Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous 6.5 31
4.14  That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami 6.4 32
4.22  Mr. McGlue's Feedbag 6.4 28
3.22  Just Once with Aunt Sophie 6.4 23
4.4  A Pot Smoking Monkey 6.3 32
3.21  And the Plot Moistens 6.3 31
4.9  Corey's Been Dead for an Hour 6.3 34
1.20  Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark 6.2 27
1.11  Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor 6.2 29
4.12  Castrating Sheep in Montana 6.2 27
2.7  A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana 6.1 23
5.18  If My Hole Could Talk 5.5 9

Unrated Episodes

# Episode
5.19  Waiting for the Right Snapper