Cornman: American Vegetable Hero (2001)

Director:

Barak Epstein

Writer:

Barak Epstein (writer)

Genre:

Adventure | Action | Comedy

Tagline:

Justice is coming.... for the Corn!

Plot:

A loser develops the ability to communicate with corn and becomes a crazy super hero. He battles the evil villain, Dr. Hoe, who wants to own all the corn in the world.

Plot Keywords:

Decapitation | Character Name In Title

Cast

Mike Wiebe	...	Dr. Hoe
Melissa Bacelar	...	Sheila #3
Adam Lockhart	...	Cornman
James Hoke	...	Cornman
Daniel Villarreal	...	The Psychic Nose / Footsoldier
Noe Garcia	...	Butterboy
Blair Rowan	...	Starch
Mae Moreno	...	Waxy
Robert Bell	...	Huckleberry Rob / Footsoldier
Russell Gavin Cooper	...	Cornsparagus
Jeannie Elliot	...	Sheila #2
Geoff Goldwater	...	Uncle Shlomo
rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Jeff Ayala	...	The Realator
Chainsaw	...	Berkowitz the Footsoldier
Sherry Dickson	...	Sheila #1
Barak Epstein	...	Footsoldier
Judah Epstein	...	Fan Boy 2
Chris Gardner	...	El Gordo (Jefe)
Lauren Graham	...	Sheila #1.5
Robert Johnson	...	Footsoldier
Jill Matelan	...	Shucker
Masuimi Max	...	The Fire Girl
John Phelan	...	Colonel Kernal
Mitch Rogers	...	Footsoldier (as Mitch Rodgers)
Jen Tran	...	Shucker
Julie Tran	...	Shucker
Socky Villarreal	...	El Gordo
Victor Wyen	...	Fan Boy 1 / Footsoldier

Also Known As:

Cornman II: The Day of the Locusts (USA) (alternative title)

Runtime:

70 min

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.66 : 1

Company:

WorldWide International Picture Studios

Movie Connections:

Spoofs "Charles in Charge" (1984)

to say it's corny, is.... nevermind

Cornman! A superhero that we can all get around! That is, if one actually watches the movie, which might be very, very, very few, as the movie wasn't even made by Troma (although Lloyd does introduce the movie on the DVD, with full corn up the you-know-what gag thrown in). It was the first movie by Barak Epstein, and you can tell it was made on the fly, without much actual things like money, good props, make-up, actors, sets, etc. But somehow they made this very bad movie into something that is unusually fun and stupid and self-conscious.

One scene that works very well on a level reminiscent (if not anywhere as good) of Return of the Killer Tomatoes is when the 'fourth wall' is broken and the film crew is seen. The director goes up to the actor playing Cornman- horrible actor, of course- and tells him this won't work, and puts in another more muscle-bound actor in his place, and suddenly the fights get better, the guy is not a half-bad Cornman (if there could be a half-good Cornman), and it's a good little rib-jab to the audience that it's knowing it sucks, and it rolls along with the crap-shoot.

At the least, Cornman is worth watching, aside from the general badness of it, for the little things, like the villain with his blade covered in cellophane, or for the sidekick who's only function is to smell with his Pinocchio nose, or for the um, yeah, lesbian shower scene that turns pretty violent (and hilarious) involving a hose. It threatens at times to become too boring, but for those who want to stick with it the pleasures are all Mystery Science Theater bound. It's so bad it flips to good, then back-flips back to bad again, and then ends somewhat in the middle. Not worth a dollar, more like... 5 cents?