Jessica:
My little sister is all grown up.
Elizabeth:
Jess, I was born four minutes before you.
Jessica:
Not ready to date? That's like, not being ready to breathe. Are you sure we're related?
Jessica:
I've taken the liberty of separating the boys at Sweet Valley High into different categories of desirability. Now these guys are warm, sensitive, and have high GPA's. Losers! Feel free to pass them on to Enid. Now, these guys have hot bodies, great cars, and cool hair.
Elizabeth:
That sounds good.
Jessica:
On second thought, I'll keep these for myself. You can have my rejects.
Jessica:
Terrible!
Lila:
Unforgivable!
Jessica:
How could we have let this happen? Look at them. It's pathetic. She's just being herself!
Lila:
How fake!
Jessica:
I'm glad Bruce didn't ask for his keys back from when I worked here
Lila:
Yeah. Now instead of breaking and entering, we're just entering.
Jessica:
You know, it's hard to think of Enid without thinking of Danny.
Elizabeth:
Manny!
Jessica:
Whatever!
Elizabeth:
I found a couple of Todd's love letters.
Jessica:
Ew!
Cheryl:
No offence, but some of the routines might be a little complex.
Lila:
We do complex. We do complex!
Jessica:
Yeah, we complicate everything.
Elizabeth:
Todd, what are you doing here?
Todd:
I was just in the neighborhood jogging and--
Elizabeth:
Isn't that your car in the driveway?
Todd:
Oh, so that's where I left it!
Winston:
That doesn't sound like Liz.
Todd:
Whose side are you on?
Winston:
Oh, no. I do not take sides when it comes to break-ups.
Shred:
Yeah, but who do you think is right, Liz or Todd?
Elizabeth:
You paid money to have Beethoven killed?
Jessica:
Not that much! I had a coupon!
Lila:
Am I invisible, or do you need new glasses?
Winston:
I can see you. Unfortunately, I can hear you also.
Todd:
I know. Remember how mad she got last year when you beat her?
Elizabeth:
She gave me the silent treatment for a month.
Todd:
Now that was a great month, wasn't it?
Manny:
What if you find someone else on the slopes?
Enid:
I won't! I'm leaving my sexy earmuffs at home.
Manny:
What about your sexy parka, the one with the ducks on it?
Manny:
I didn't want you to forget what I look like.
Enid:
It's only two days. Besides, I could never forget you...Danny
Manny:
Manny!
Enid:
I know, I'm just kidding.
Jessica:
The only reason it was a good kiss was because I'm a good kisser!
Enid:
Mr. Wiseman, I've never cheated on anything in my life. Well except the time i was on the grapefruit diet and I ate a banana.
Jessica:
Please! Like anybody reads in the library!
Officer:
You were speeding and you ran the sign.
Jessica:
If I was speeding, how was I supposed to read the sign?
Jessica:
So? We'd be perfect. With my good looks, and your...ability to look like me, we're unstoppable!
Lila:
Any moron can pass a social studies test. Which country has never had a king or queen? England, France or the United States?
Jessica:
France
Lila:
Jessica, the United States has never had a queen.
Jessica:
Excuse me! Queen Latifah!
Jessica:
Liz, my future's in your hands. If you say no now, I may never get on TV. I could wind up just like every other random nobody out there, only more beautiful.
Todd:
I saw my life pass before my eyes. It was a very short movie, and you were in every scene.
Teacher:
I'm going to let you take a make-up test.
Jessica:
Perfect! I know all about makeup.
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