Instant Karma (1990)

Orson Bean: Dr. Berlin

Quotes 

• Dr. Berlin : You say you're in love... why do you seem to be so troubled, then?

  Zane : Maybe wanting to be great in someone else's eyes makes us examine ourselves more closely.

  Dr. Berlin : Well, that's what we're here for.

  Zane : I just really think I sold out.

  Dr. Berlin : Where does all this guilt come from?

  Zane : I just wanted to be a great writer like my dad, you know? He was an artist.

  Dr. Berlin : Well, as I understand it, he never really got anywhere.

  Zane : Well, that depends on how you look at it. I couldn't feel good about myself if I knew I willingly sold out.

  Dr. Berlin : Maybe you were seduced?

  Zane : Was I?

  Dr. Berlin : Let me ask you... Would you rather have the money? Or the art?

  Zane : [pauses to consider]  Both.

  Dr. Berlin : Ah, well, maybe you can't *have* both.

  Zane : Well... Well, if I said the money, I couldn't respect myself. And, if I said the art... I couldn't afford you.

  Dr. Berlin : Maybe we better have a little hypnotherapy.

• Dr. Berlin : [talking to Zane, after he has put him into a state of hypnosis]  As you go deeper into hypnosis, you will come to realize that the nature of women is... duplicity. Penelope is a liar. She is lying to you. Well, women... they don't have the strength, or the power, of the male. So, they are practiced in the art of deception. Ah, women. They are like streetcars, anyway. You miss one, another one comes along. This... this is a man's world. And you are a masculine man.

• Zane : [In therapy session with Dr. Berlin]  Water is a mystical medium, because it evaporates. I loved Amy. I thought she loved me. Then about a year ago she said, "I've found somebody else. I'm leaving you."

  Dr. Berlin : Well, what about now?

  Zane : Picture a vast desert - a wasteland. Nothing in it as far as the eye can see, except for one tiny, lone figure. That's me, Dr. Berlin. I'm all alone. All my relationships are professional - except for my dog, Wolfgang. I need someone to love. I don't know what the problem is. I mean, my career is going well. You know, I meet a lot of women, but I always seem to screw things up!

  Dr. Berlin : I see...

  Zane : Do you?

  Dr. Berlin : Yes. The dog barks, but the caravan moves on... Let's do some hypnotherapy.