- Chaz: [watching Kit and Rob through binoculars] Respectable young Quaker couple returning from a quiet afternoon of nonviolent sex.
- [everyone admires the view of the lake from Muffy's window]
- Nikki: On a clear day, you can see the Kennedys.
- Nikki: [on camera] My name is Mary O'Reilly O'Toole O'Shea. Somewhere out there is the island my friend Muffy owns. It's spring break and she's invited us over there for the weekend and we're waiting for the ferry now to take us there, and... I don't know what else to say.
- Chaz: [voice] Why don't you tell us something about yourself?
- Nikki: Oh, all right, something about myself. Um, I wanna work with handicapped children, and my parents are my best friends. Oh, and I start convent school next semester... and I fuck on the first date. April Fool's!
- [everybody laughs]
- Arch: You're telling me! When I was out there swinging in the woods, I nearly crapped my pants.
- Ferryman: What do you mean "nearly"?
- Chaz: Arch? You browned your trou?
- Arch: Well, uh... you know, I was...
- Constable Potter: It's all right, Arch, they'll be out of the dryer soon.
- Chaz: [stands close to Nan and coughs exaggeratedly] Hi, what're you reading?
- Nan: Milton's Paradise Lost, for Professor Russo's course in English epic. You know, it's a shame; it's a dying form.
- Chaz: Dying...
- Nan: Not too many people read it nowadays, even in college.
- Chaz: [feigning interest] Really?
- Nan: What about you?
- Chaz: Oh, uh, Treasure Island - the history of pornography in America.
- Nikki: [reading magazine quiz] My first experience was A. Painful and degrading. B. Not so hot but I really cared about him. C. I was ready to try again. D. Wildly exciting, I had an orgasm.
- Muffy: A and part of B.
- Nikki: A, painful and degrading, not so hot but I really cared about him, awww that's so sweet!
- Kit: I'll take B.
- Nikki: Not so hot but I really cared about him. Was it Rob?
- Kit: Uh, no it wasn't Rob. What about you, Niki?
- Nikki: Um, A and D, painful and degrading, wildly exciting, I had an orgasm.
- [they laugh]
- Skip: A poor boy can say 'Fuck you, Dad, I'm my own person'. What's his father gonna do? Kick him out of the house, disinherit him? His life won't change much. He's got nothing to lose.
- Nikki: His father's love.
- Skip: That was lost a long time ago.
- Nikki: Skip, blaming yourself won't make Buck any better.
- Rob: He said to forget it. He said that my grades might be okay but basically I possess an essential lack of seriousness, and that's what they look for.
- Arch: Him too? That's what my guy said. I said "You gotta be kidding. I mean how can anyone be serious about anything when some moron can steal a bomb or push a button and nuke us all until our shadows glow?" He wasn't impressed with that, but...
- Arch: [mocking tone] Hi, my name is Mary O'Riley O'Tool O'Shea. I want to go to convent school and things like that. Welcome, welcome to my home and lifestyles of the rich and undeserving.
- Muffy: We used to spend all our summers here before my mother died, this is a very special place to me.
- Nan: [about the table set with dolls at every setting] Just like Agatha Christie.
- Chaz: And sporks.
- Arch: Sporks?
- Chaz: [mocking voice] And napkins with bunnies on 'em. Gee, Muff, you really spare no expense.
- Muffy: Well now how do you think Daddy made his money?
- Nikki: The old fashioned way, he inherited it.
- Nan: [about the doll at her place] I used to have all her outfits.
- Kit: It's okay now, with the others, they were outside, but you...
- Chaz: We're inside now, so we're safe.
- Nan: It's all because of what happened at the ferry, isn't it?
- Chaz: It was an accident! Christ! Don't they know that?
- Arch: Muffy, where do you keep your guns?
- Muffy: Guns? We don't keep guns in this house.
- Nan: Can I make a toast? Well, someone once said to me to cherish the friends you make in college.
- Arch: I try to cherish *all* the friends I make.
- Nikki: Stop it.
- Nan: Because... they'll be the friends you cherish most for the rest of your life. So, here's to us and here's to my life, because I'm very glad to be here. And to be a part of all of you.
- Kit: Muffy, anything you want to add to that?
- Muffy: Why me?
- Nikki: Because you're the hostess.
- Muffy: Okay. In his Life of Johnson, Janus Boswell said 'We cannot predict the precise moment when friendships are formed, as in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last one which makes it run over. So in a series of kindnesses, there is at last one which makes the heart run over.' So, with this toast, may our hearts run over and our friendships be formed.
- Rob: [about the constable] He's on his way, he wants us to wait here and stay together.
- Chaz: What about the ferryman?
- Rob: It wasn't him, they've been together all day.
- Chaz: What?
- Kit: I don't understand.
- Rob: I don't either. Look, he's gonna send up a flare as soon as he nears the dock. And then we'll all go down as a group and meet him there. In the meantime we just wait here.
- Nan: [sees the well out back] When she said well she really meant *well*, who dug this thing, Pocahontas?
- Arch: [enters his room] Alright, ladies, we're gonna have some privacy.
- [pushes the beds together, Chaz walks in with his stuff]
- Arch: You gotta be kidding.
- Chaz: Unless Muffy knows something about us that we don't.
- Arch: [they fall on the bed grabbing each other laughing] Hold me, boyfriend, hold me.
- Chaz: Just holster it, cowboy, will ya?
- Arch: Let's play hide the sausage!
- Chaz: Giddyup!
- Rob: [finds a letter on the boat] State Hospital. 'Pursuant to our previous communications, please be advised that the patient under discussion has still not been found and returned to custody, and is now believed to be attempting to return to her home in your jurisdiction. If encountered exercise extreme caution and notify us immediately as Miss St. John has been a patient here for three years and is still considered incorrigibly unstable and extremely dangerous.
- Kit: Muffy hasn't been in an institution for three years, she's been at Vassar.
- Chaz: Wait a minute, aren't we supposed to be staying together? What about Rob and Muffy?
- Kit: Rob's out back checking the doors.
- Chaz: Yeah well what about Muffy?
- Nan: She's been acting less than normal anyway.
- Kit: What do you mean?
- Nan: All day and you haven't noticed?
- Harvey: Well who isn't?
- Nan: Those nurse's shoes.
- Chaz: What nurse's shoes?
- Nan: The clodhoppers she's been walking around in all day long. Crepe soles?
- Kit: Do you see him?
- Rob: No. He must not have a light on his boat.
- Kit: Or he's chosen not to use it.
- Rob: Kit, he said something else about Muffy on the phone.
- Kit: What?
- Rob: He said not to trust anyone, that's why we were supposed to stay together. No one was supposed to be alone with anyone else. Then he said 'Especially not Muffy'.
- Kit: Well what did he mean by that?
- Rob: I don't know, he wouldn't explain it.
- Kit: But that's ridiculous.
- Rob: Is it? Think about it, he's known her a lot longer than we have.
- Muffy: I'm not worried about those two, Skip and Arch, they're probably just playing some kind of stupid trick.