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22 out of 24 people found the following review useful: Goofy as Hell but Good Fun, 25 November 2005 Author: TDeMona from Finland
This movie is impossible to rate.Anyway, it is even more goofy, campy and stupid than the two legendary Conan movies. Acting is so bad. Casting stinks. Plot is really ridiculous, nothing has any importance to the viewer. But the main thing is, you will not be bored watching this stuff. I mean, c'moon! The red haired what-was-her-name warrior woman doing her unbelievable annoying Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonations and kicking butt like some prehistoric Xena, Arnold himself being as lame as he will ever be trying not to be Conan (and fails in that completely), the mighty Karate Kid prince turning from complete asshole the world's sweetest little boy in one scene and the fat buy who follows him around with a huge bone and does as much fighting as Arnold and Sonja... I mean, where they get this stuff!? (I hope I didn't spoil anything. Think not. And with this movie, it isn't even important).It's amazing how great the set decoration, wardrobe and especially score is. The themes of this film are really magnificent. The Red Sonya theme, the beautiful music, the grande finale in the end, oh my God...This movie doesn't suck. It's a bad film, but in a very good way. I wanted to watch it again straight away, I laughed through the whole movie. You should not take it as a serious Robert E. Howard movie, if you are a fan of his work (like I am), because Sonja (in this form) wasn't even his character. Hollywood needs more movies like this.
16 out of 22 people found the following review useful: Mildly entertaining if not taken too seriously, 12 June 2004 Author: ColonelFaulkner
Have just seen this film for the first time after purchasing it on DVDIt comes across as a cheap attempt to cash in on the two Conan movies.Unfortunately, this film didn't appear to have the same budget as the Conan films and hence some of the sets and effects aren't as flash and some scenes seem hurried. Nielsen is OK to look at but unfortunately she couldn't act if a gun was put to her head. Arnie's supporting role looked like it was done as a favor to director Fleischer, who also directed Conan the Destroyer. Maybe Arnie wasn't confident that he would go on to headline films like Predator, Total Recall, T2, etc.Some of the female guardians of the talisman early in the film looked like they were struggling to lift their swords and the looks on their faces suggested they were having great fun making this film. I couldn't be so jovial if I was fighting for my life.All this aside, this film required very little concentration to watch and was mildly entertaining. I've seen a lot worse. Two stars.
13 out of 17 people found the following review useful: Not much of anything., 7 June 2001 Author: gridoon
Sometimes intentionally campy, at other times unintentionally silly (like in the opening scene, where a woman is "informed" that she has been raped and that her family has been slaughtered, just for the sake of exposition), this film is ultimately neither funny enough nor competent enough (as a straightforward adventure story) to be really enjoyable. I'll leave you to decide which may be the highlight, but the low point is probably the fight with a silly metallic dragon. Brigitte Nielsen was a good choice for Sonja, with her fresh face and her firm, slightly muscular body (and I think that her dark-red hair suits her perfectly), but Schwarzenegger gives one of his few colorless performances as Calidor. (*1/2)
14 out of 19 people found the following review useful: I'm glad I gave it a chance, 19 June 1999 Author: Doug Alderman from Pennsylvania, USA
Not really my bag as far as movie types go (not really into the fantastical) but I'm glad I saw this film. There seemed to be very little use of stuntpersons or body doubles in the majority of fight scenes. Bridgette Nielsen clearly worked it off to put on a good showing. How Schwarzanegger got top billing I'm not sure, but his limited part was, of course, excellently portrayed. Film quality was fair, considering the fantasy-esque backdrop and the fact that it was shot in the early 80s. I'll go out wide on a limb and give it a couple of stars.My take: 6.5
11 out of 16 people found the following review useful: Good Spin Off From Conan Series, 11 January 2005 Author: DeathSlayer from Perth, Australia
I'm a great fan of the Conan series and of course my favourite is the first of the series "Conan the Barbarian". I bought Red Sonja on DVD for only $9.95 and I was surprised to find as entertaining as the first two Conan films. Arnold Schwarzenegger executed his character outstanding throughout the fight scenes and as Kalidor even though the film was focused on Red Sonja. Brigitte Nielsen was beautiful and played Red Sonja perfectly to heighten the suspense and action through the fight scenes. The Film quality was good into creating a fantasy environment. The Action scenes in this film was the main part that me through this film even though its PG there's enough blood for the warmongers to enjoy. To conclude whoever loves Barbaric films such as the Conan films or Kull the Conqueror this is the film for you. Conan The Barbarian (1982) 8/10 Conan The Destroyer (1984) 6/10 Red Sonja (1985) 6/10
4 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Reminds me of the good-old Drive-In movie days., 5 December 2003 Author: jack flynn from Fairfax, VA
This movie gets better with age. If you've got a sense of humor and don't need Industrial Light and Magic special effects, the combination of actors (all playing off the winsome Brigette Nielson) makes this a fun movie to see again...or for the first time.It's probably also the movie that got Arnold in hot water during the "recall."
8 out of 12 people found the following review useful: Will have you seeing red, 22 September 2004 Author: Wizard-8 from Victoria, BC
Richard Fleischer was not the right man to direct this movie, not only being long past his prime, but that fantasy was not his forte. Some scenes go on forever, while other scenes are cut short or seem missing. (There are indications that they tried to save this in the editing room.) In fairness to Fleischer, he was working with a tight budget that made everything (even the wilderness scenes) look cheap and cheesy. Also, the screenplay is hard to take seriously, with its unfunny comic relief and goofy touches. Some of the swordplay isn't bad, but a little of that goes a long way. An embarrassment to everyone involved; even the Morricone score manages to be lackluster.
5 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Actually, As Much As People Hate This, It Still Runs Like Conan 3., 22 April 2007 Author: Fiendish_Dramaturgy from .: Fiendish Writings in the Dark :.
It is sad that Schwarzenegger was the best thing about this production, especially considering the fact that he had not yet come into his own, and was still as stiff as cardboard in his dialog delivery.Actually, this isn't as bad as some critics say, but it isn't good, either. It IS amusing, and DOES play like a poor country cousin of the Conan line, making it a conflicted, uneven, poor work. And speaking of poor, the quality is terrible, due to the era in which this was filmed, but that is not the only reason.The story herein is inferior, even to the Conan line, but moreover, it loses itself in the "Red Sonja must be dominated by big strong Schwarzenegger" ploy, and entirely forgets its purpose, if it ever had one.It's entertaining, but in a low-budget, guilty-pleasure "B" kind of way.It rates a 4.2/10 from...the Fiend :.
6 out of 9 people found the following review useful: so it is true, only women may touch it, 4 July 2005 Author: Max Imus from Michigan Tech
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Quote of the movie: "so it is true, only women may touch it" What was good:The Soundtrack was really good thanks to genus, Ennio Morricone. Red Sonja looked really good in that little cloth piece she wore throughout the movie. There is more red hair in this film than a shedding Irish Setter. What was bad: The little kid playing the ruler of a land terribly over acts. I am not sure if this is because he is a bad kid actor or if it was suppose to be.There was a scene where Arnold rides around hitting people from his horse, but in a wide-angle shot, there is nobody dead on the ground.The special effects for 1985 are fairly lame, including the mechanical spider in the castle lair is so bad-dd.The costumes were designed as if there was a sale at a early 1980's salvation army. Costume of the movie goes to the oriental old man, "grandmaster", with the white sheet and black straps is quite a sight. With poles that come out of his back, I don't know how he can enter a doorway. It takes 18 minutes for Arnold to actually read a line. A fun movie to drink a little and laugh at the action or lack of action. This movie could of been done a lot worse.
17 out of 31 people found the following review useful: Inept sword 'n' sorcery flick which pretty much destroyed its own genre., 28 December 2005 Author: Jonathon Dabell (barnaby.rudge@hotmail.co.uk) from Wakefield, England
Red Sonja is a career-step-in-the-wrong-direction for Arnold Schwarzenegger. Having made a couple of sword 'n' sorcery films (as Conan) he had moved onto slightly more serious acting roles in films like The Terminator and Commando, only to make a mystifying return to the sword 'n' sorcery genre for this 1985 debacle. It's hard to figure out why he bothered, as this is weaker than both Conan films in every conceivable department. Allegedly, this was to have been the third Conan film, but for one reason or another the emphasis was shifted onto the leading female character, the titular red-head, leaving poor old Arnold to play an incredibly dull supporting role. Spare a thought, too, for director Richard Fleischer who had given the world classics like 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, Fantastic Voyage, The Boston Strangler and 10 Rillington Place. In this - his penultimate film - Fleischer also has taken a gigantic career step backwards.Evil queen Gedren (Sandahl Bergman) wants to rule the world, and she needs a priceless and powerful talisman to do so. She and her brutish army storm a keep populated by priestesses and steal the said talisman, massacring the helpless priestesses as they go. One of the dead priestesses has a sister named Sonja (Brigitte Nielsen), a fiery red-headed warrior, who upon hearing of her sister's death swears revenge upon the evil Gedren. Sonja rides across the land in search of Gedren's lair. Along the way she picks up travelling companions in the shape of a boy prince, Tarn (Ernie Reyes Jr) and his bodyguard Falkon (Paul Smith). She also meets the muscular warrior Conan - sorry, I mean Kalidor (!) - who offers to join her in her quest. Initially Sonja doesn't want the help of Kalidor (Arnold Schwarzenegger), preferring instead to prove that she can confront and defeat her enemies alone, but eventually she warms to him and accepts his assistance.Red Sonja is a staggeringly poor film, all the more so when one muses that it was made in 1985 when the sword 'n' sorcery genre was close to its end. It seems so simplistic and amateurish that one could easily mistake it for an early example of its kind. The performances are poor on the whole, ranging from Bergman's embarrassingly OTT villain to Reyes' unbelievably irritating spoilt brat to Schwarzenegger's wooden and unenthusiastic hero. Nielsen is slightly better as the heroine - presumably full of enthusiasm at the thought of being in her first starring role - but she is let down very badly by the stupidity of Clive Exton and George MacDonald Fraser's script. The film is riddled with goofs, including a scene where Schwarzenegger is seen in close-up hacking down bad guys but in a long-shot in the same sequence there isn't a corpse in sight. Technically it is very inept too, with sub-standard special effects and appallingly mechanical monsters. There are a few compensations, such as Ennio Morricone's enjoyable music (Morricone spent a great deal of the '80s providing good music for awful films, e.g The Island, Treasure of the Four Crowns and Hundra). Another compensation is Giuseppe Rotunno's lensing of the locations - in fact, much of the time it's a hell of a lot more gratifying to look at the lovely scenery than the actors standing in the foreground! There were very few sword 'n' sorcery films after Red Sonja, so in some ways it might go down in history as the film which destroyed its own genre.
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