Up the Creek (1984)
Tim Matheson: Bob McGraw
Photos
Quotes
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Heather Merriweather : You wouldn't lie to me?
Bob McGraw : Of course I would lie to you, I'm a guy. But I'm not lying now.
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Bob McGraw : The competition looks a little weirder than I expected.
[followed by the howling sound of a coyote]
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Bob McGraw : Let's just say I slipped on a bar of soap in the shower as a bus ran out of control and crashed into the medicine cabinet.
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Heather Merriweather : [Walking away from Rex] I have nothing to say to you.
Bob McGraw : Well I'm sure if you just took the time to get to know me we could work something out.
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Bob McGraw : Wanna fool around? Wanna get married? Want fellatio or what? If I'm being too forward, just tell me to back off.
Heather Merriweather : Um, how about a name first.
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Bob McGraw : Well, you just made it through the world's most dangerous rapid... and now... it's beer time!
Irwin : You mean I risked my life and you give me lite-beer?
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Heather Merriweather : Why don't you come on in and shut the door. Why don't you lock it. Why don't you...
Bob McGraw : I think I can take it from here.
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Bob McGraw : He needed shave, bath, a cup of coffee and a good woman, something told him he was in the wrong place.
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Bob McGraw : At that moment he knew what the night held in store for them, and he liked the smell of it.
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Chuck the Wonder Dog : [Barking while running along the creek, holding Irwin's underwear in his mouth]
Bob McGraw : Hey! It's Chuck! Hey, Chucker!
Chuck the Wonder Dog : [Whines, barks, and rolls around on the bank of the creek]
Max : Bob, it looks like he's been drinking again...
Gonzer : No, no, no, no, no... not drinking, look in his mouth! It's Irwin's underwear!
Max : Oh, well then no wonder he's acting like that.
Chuck the Wonder Dog : [Drops Irwin's underwear and gags]
Bob McGraw : That can mean only one thing!
Gonzer : Irwin's naked!
Bob McGraw : Right! And Chuck knows where he is! Let's go!
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Bob McGraw : [Being chased by the Preppies from Ivy College, realizes he's run down a dead end] Shit!
[Turns around]
Bob McGraw : Hold it, hold it, hold it! Guys, guys! Now I know you're all wondering why I called you down here tonight. Be... cause I want to talk to you
[points at one of the Preppies]
Bob McGraw : about herpes.
[Throws a punch before proceeding to get beat up]