Curse of the Pink Panther (1983)
Donald Sumpter: Dave
Quotes
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Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Obviously, Mr. President, so as not to limit our choice, I will omit sex, height, weight, race, and nationality. Ready, Aldous?
Aldous : Ready, Charles.
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Age: 61. Senior officer. IQ...
[looking closer at his paper, then stifling a giggle]
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : ...genius. Specialities: judo, kung fu, Okinawan weaponry, karate expert...
[stifling more laughter]
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : ...black belt. Expert ma... ma... marksman. Fearless. Courageous. A born leader.
[laughing so hard, he can't continue]
Dave : Is that it, Chief?
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : [still stifling his laughter] Mm-hmm.
Dave : Select.
Aldous : Coming right up.
President of France : [it hums as it processes] What is he humming?
Deputy Commissioner : It sounds like "Moon River"... backwards.
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Dave : A Series 600 Huxley computer. You can program it by voice command, you know. Wait. Observe this. Activate. Aldous?
Aldous : Ready, Dave.
Dave : Aldous can even recognize people's voices.
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Hmm. Amazing.
Aldous : Elementary.
Dave : Chief Inspector Dreyfus, Sûreté, vital statistics, please.
Aldous : Coming up, Dave.
Dave : [it hums as it processes] What's the delay?
Aldous : Lots of material.
Dave : Well, just give me an abbreviated version, then.
Aldous : All right. Charles Larousse Dreyfus. Born Marseilles April 1, 19...
Dave : Skip that. Skip that. Uh, what is the subject's present occupation?
Aldous : Subject's present occupation... chief inspector, criminal division, Sûreté.
Dave : How's his health?
Aldous : Last complete physical examination... January 7th, this year. Chronic hypertension. May 1978, suffered nervous breakdown and was committed to the state mental...
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Skip that bit.
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Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : What are the odds that the greatest detective in the world will find Clouseau?
Aldous : Even money. Take your pick.
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Well, aren't you being slightly optimistic?
Aldous : Not at all. Why? Are you afraid he'll drive you crazy again?
Dave : Cool it, Aldous.
Aldous : Just responding with an obvious observation. I hope I didn't offend you, Inspector Dreyfus.
Chief Insp. Charles LaRousse Dreyfus : Not at all. By the way, it's Chief Inspector Dreyfus.
Dave : Shame on you, Aldous.
Aldous : Nobody's perfect. Have a happy day.