Memorable quotes for
"Dungeons & Dragons" (1983) More at IMDbPro »

[the kids have had enough of Venger foiling their attempts to get home]
Eric: It's all Venger's fault! We oughtta do something about that guy.
Hank: Eric's right!
Eric: I am?
Hank: Yeah, and we ARE going to do something about him!
Eric: We are?
Hank: That's right. The only chance we have of getting out of this world is if we take care of Venger once and for all.
Shiela: But how? Nobody can stop Venger. Not even Dungeon Master!
Hank: Wrong. There's one thing that can. A dragon: Tiamat.
Eric: [shocked] You're crazy...

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[Kelek has just been busted for trying to usurp Venger's power]
Bobby: [sing-song] Somebody's gettin' in trou-ble!

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Presto: Sorry Eric... my hat doesn't work that well when it's wet.
Eric: Or any other time!

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[Bobby is walking with Sogor, both appear to be the same age]
Sogor: How old are you Bobby?
Bobby: Almost ten
Sogor: And you're allowed to go out on your own? I wasn't allowed to go out on my own till I was 55!
Bobby: Fifty-five? How old are you now?
Sogor: Seventy-four.
[Bobby drops his firewood and takes off running]

---

Presto: My hocus-pocus is out of focus.

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Eric: Now what?
Presto: Now we find Tiamat.
Eric: How do we know which one is her?
Presto: Easy, dummy. She'll be the one who attacks us.

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Eric: We're outnumbered ten to one!
Diana the Acrobat: Alright then. You take two, I'll take eighteen.

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Shiela: We're trapped in another world.
Eric: What else is new.

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Hank: The orcs took Bobby and me to their camp. I managed to escape, but Bobby couldn't.
Shiela: That's a lie!
Diana the Acrobat: Sheila! What's the matter?
Shiela: I went to the orc camp. I saw Hank talking to the orcs. They were planning our capture. He's working for them now!

---

Shiela: Make him tell what he did to Bobby! Where's my brother?
Diana the Acrobat: Take it easy, Sheila.
Shiela: But what if treason isn't the only thing he's guilty of? What if he's guilty of...

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Venger: Beware what you say when you speak of magic, wizard, or you shall see who has the greater power.

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Dungeon Master: Evil energy is like evil force. Change its direction, and it changes to good!

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Venger: I will use the magic of your hat to add to my power!

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Eric: Y-you guys grow up to be wookies?

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Diana the Acrobat: Obi-Wan Kenobi he's not!

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Eric: [speaking to Presto] Did you hear what he said? No telling *what* we may run into.
Dungeon Master: [appearing from nowhere] No telling?
Eric: [shouts in startlement] Dungeon Master! Do you always have to do that?
Dungeon Master: No. Not always.
Eric: Huh?

---

[The Young Ones are trapped by a pack of wolves; a howl in the distance makes them suddenly leave]
Shiela: What do you think scared them off?
Eric: Simple Sheila, they took one look at my great strength; one look at my grim weapon.
Diana the Acrobat: And one look at your grody face.
[Bobby laughs loudly]

---

Hank: [addressing some Bullywugs] Hello. We come in peace.
Eric: A lot of good *that's* gonna do.
Hank: It always works in the movies.

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Dungeon Master: Just follow that path. But beware. You must never touch - the beauty - that breathes the beast.
Eric: Beauty that breathes the beast? What is that, Cinderella with bad breath?

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Golem: Golem destroy intruders.
Bobby: Oh yeah? Not before I do a Steve Garvey number on your nose!

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[Bobby has been bitten by a dragon turtle and is sick]
Diana the Acrobat: There must be something we can do. We can't just let him get worse.
Dungeon Master: The only cure - is the foot of a Yellowdragon.
Eric: Oh great. What are we supposed to do? Waltz up to a yellow dragon and ask to borrow his foot?

---

Shiela: I think we're lost.
Presto: I think we're exhausted.
Eric: I think we're stupid.

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Eric: [sarcastically] This is great. Now we're looking for a bunch of crybabies and a yacht club.

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Hank: I wonder why there are no guards around here.
Eric: Because nobody is stupid enough to ever try to come here, that's why.

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Dungeon Master: However, through defeat you shall find victory.
Diana the Acrobat: What's that supposed to mean?
Eric: It means the warranty has run out on Dungeon Master's brain.

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Bobby: The giant's gaining on us.
Shiela: He'll be dancing on us if we don't hurry.

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Presto: I'll fiddle with my twiddle and diddle with the middle and make a magic riddle that'll turn the giant little.
Eric: Oh great. Now he's doing nursery rhymes.

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Presto: Sheesh Eric, enough with the spit and polish, huh?
Eric: You can never have too much polish, Presto.
[mumbling to himself]
Eric: Cause I ran outta spit an hour ago.

---

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