Sleuth (1972)

Laurence Olivier: Andrew Wyke

Photos 

Quotes 

• Andrew Wyke : It's sex! Sex is the game! Marriage is the penalty. Round and round we jog towards each futile anniversary. Pass "Go". Collect 200 rows, 200 silences, 200 scars in the deep places.

• Andrew Wyke : You're a jumped up pantry boy who doesn't know his place!

• Andrew Wyke : For Christ sake Milo, they couldn't have made more noise on D-Day.

  Milo Tindle : The bloody glass came out, my bloody boot got stuck and I fell down the bloody ladder.

  Andrew Wyke : Well the bloody police must have heard it all the way to bloody Salisbury.

  Milo Tindle : I'm sorry.

• Milo Tindle : Alright, I'll do it. Where do you want me to break in?

  Andrew Wyke : Not so fast. You've got to get disguised first.

  Milo Tindle : What for?

  Andrew Wyke : Suppose somebody saw you coming.

  Milo Tindle : Here? In the middle of nowhere? I could hardly find this place with a bloody map!

  Andrew Wyke : You never know. A dallying couple, a passing sheep-rapist.

• Andrew Wyke : [picking out a possible disguise for the phony robbery]  One black facemask, one black flat cap, a striped jersey and a bag marked "Swag".

  Milo Tindle : Why not a neon sign with "Burglar" on it?

• Andrew Wyke : You said everything was in plain view!

  Milo Tindle : Well aren't I the shifty old sly boots, then.

• Andrew Wyke : Property's always been more highly regarded in this country than people.

• Andrew Wyke : There are certain skills best acquired in public bars, I suppose.

• Andrew Wyke : So I understand you wish to marry my wife.

• Andrew Wyke : On the morning of his execution, King Charles the First put on two shirts. 'If I tremble with the cold,' he said, 'my enemies will say it was from fear. I will not expose myself to such reproaches.' We must also attempt this Anglo-Saxon dignity as you mount the steps to the scaffold.

• Andrew Wyke : Wit in the face of adversity! Good! You've learned something from the English.

• Andrew Wyke : It's a good thing, I am pretty much of an Olympic sexual athlete.

  Milo Tindle : Yes, I suppose these days you are concentrating more on the sprints than on the long distance stuff.

  Andrew Wyke : Not so dear boy! I am in the peak of condition. I could copulate for England at any distance.

  Milo Tindle : Well, as they say in the Olympics, it's not the winning, it's the taking part that counts.

• Andrew Wyke : The shortest way to a man's heart is through humiliation.

• Milo Tindle : It looks like you've had it. They're coming up the drive.

  Andrew Wyke : Keep them out!

  Milo Tindle : Keep the police out? It's just not done, old boy. But still, I'll try.

• Milo Tindle : You're mad! You're a bloody madman!

  Andrew Wyke : You are a young man dressed as a clown about to be murdered.

• Andrew Wyke : Finally, at your moment of dying, you are yourself - a sniveling, dago clown. Farewell, Punchinello!

  Milo Tindle : Please!

  Andrew Wyke : [fires the gun] 

• Andrew Wyke : You shit!

  Milo Tindle : Grazie mille.

  Andrew Wyke : You all-time, knockdown, champion BASTARD, Milo!

  Milo Tindle : You're too kind.

• Andrew Wyke : Whether I love her or not, I found her. I've kept her. She represents me. Once, she was in love with me.

  Milo Tindle : And now she's in love with me. And you can't forgive that.

• Andrew Wyke : There's nothing like a little bit of mayhem to cheer one up.

• Inspector Doppler : [after tasting]  Caviar, eh? Can't say I like it. Tastes of fish eggs.

  Andrew Wyke : [sarcastically]  Fancy.

• Andrew Wyke : You're not giving me any kind of a chance, you sadistic bloody Wop!

  Milo Tindle : I hope I didn't hear that correctly...

• Milo Tindle : Why don't you ask yourself how your man Merridick would go about the search?

  Andrew Wyke : Merridew! St. John Lord Merridew!

• Milo Tindle : A turnstile to the bedrooms?

  Andrew Wyke : One way or another, one always pays to get in.

• Milo Tindle : There it is! The original blunt instrument; the poker. Right!

  Andrew Wyke : Now steady...

  Milo Tindle : Where do you want it?

  Andrew Wyke : Don't get carried away. It's not a murder weapon you're talking about you know!

  Milo Tindle : No?

  Andrew Wyke : No. We're discussing an object from which I receive in the classic formula a glancing blow which will raise a lump without actually cracking the cranium.

  Milo Tindle : Why don't I just keep tapping you lightly on the head with the poker until a lump comes up?

• Andrew Wyke : Milo, baby, lemme handle this one, eh? Crime's my baaag. I got this caper worked out ta the last detail!

• Andrew Wyke : My wife showers. I bathe.

• Andrew Wyke : Put that back, please! It's an old Egyptian blocking game. It's taken me rather a long time to get it there.

• Andrew Wyke : I have nothing against lapsed Catholics. In fact, some of my best friends are lapsed Catholics.

• Andrew Wyke : The mistresses' bedroom. Or, would you know your way about?

  Milo Tindle : The mistress, or her bedroom?

• Andrew Wyke : Barmen are notorious opponents of exactitude, Inspector. Vinous gossip is their stock and trade.

• Andrew Wyke : [he has just started the game of pool and run the table]  Whatever are you doing with that cue in your hand?

  Milo Tindle : I was waiting for you to miss.

  Andrew Wyke : Heh-heh, foolish boy.