- Nurse Sally Ann: [a large Australian is punching Tom during a bar brawl] They're killing him!
- 'Tank' Martin: It'll take hours.
- Tom Ferris: Well, your's ain't too bad.
- 'Tank' Martin: Mine? I figured she was more your style.
- Tom Ferris: Mine?
- 'Tank' Martin: Yeah. Rather attractive, I think.
- Tom Ferris: Yeah, if you're crazy about Thomas Jefferson.
- General Milt Walters: What's the poop on the General's new exec, eh, what's his name, Williams.
- Tom Ferris: No, sir. It's Wilson.
- General Milt Walters: Oh, yeah.
- Tom Ferris: Terrence Wilson. West Point '28. DFC. Advisor. Chief of Staff. Pentagon. First class game of bridge, sir. Golf handicap is four.
- General Milt Walters: Fine.
- Tom Ferris: Now, just a moment, sir. Excuse me. Likes Polish vodka on the rocks. Large with the ladies. Preference Blondes. As a matter of fact, preference any kind of woman, sir.
- BBC Commentator: General, BBC. Would you care to make a statement?
- Tom Ferris: Yes.
- [reciting limerick]
- Tom Ferris: There was a young girl from East Lynn, Who daily drank four quarts of gin, When told that she shouldn't, She said that she wouldn't, Except it was good for her skin.
- BBC Commentator: Thank you, General. I know that our viewers will be deeply reassured by your words.
- Tom Ferris: I'm gonna be jammed right to the hatch.
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: How much room can it take?
- Tom Ferris: Can what take?
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: A little corkscrew. A corkscrew only that big. You can stick it ANYWHERE!
- Tom Ferris: You're Italian, aren't you.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: Yes.
- Tom Ferris: But, you're blonde.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: It's not allowed?
- Tom Ferris: Oh, I'm not complaining. But, it's just that I never think of brunettes as blondes. I - I mean Italian. I - I mean it's usually more one way than the other. I mean, whatever the other way was, I like it better your way. Yes, that's what I mean.
- 'Tank' Martin: There's no other word for this but fate. I mean, two strangers lost, drifting. Then, the miracle happens. Eyes meet. Hands touch. Lips - hunger, fuse in that one moment of ecstasy. Would you like another drink?
- Tom Ferris: I loved your voice, but, now that I can see, I love where it comes from.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: I think you're pulling my foot.
- Tom Ferris: You mean, your leg - and I'd love to.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: He can't be that much of a monster.
- Tom Ferris: He can't, huh? Then why does he sleep in a coffin?
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: Oh, stop.
- Tom Ferris: I mean it. When he orders a Bloody Mary, it's the real thing.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: Tank, when you're - up there - do you ever think about - about anything happening?
- 'Tank' Martin: What's the use of kidding. There isn't one of us that doesn't think about it. The terror. Cold, numbing, terror that you're alive and whole and then - all the sudden, without warning, there you are: married.
- 'Tank' Martin: We got three nurses in from Australia. You think kangaroos jump. These kids are breaking records every night.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: I am so confused.
- 'Tank' Martin: Tom? And me? Well, it's the war Julie, Everything's upside down. The trick is - not to think about it.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: It's not the war, it's me. I've always wanted two of everything. As a little girl, I was afraid to lose what I loved. Wit two tings, you're - you're always safer. Two blue blankets. Two puppy dogs. Two pussycats.
- 'Tank' Martin: You'd a been a smash on the Ark.
- 'Tank' Martin: Tom's had 58 missions. I'd say his nerves are desperately in need of a retuning.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: He seems fine to me.
- 'Tank' Martin: Well, perhaps. But, as his flight commander, I'm afraid I'm going to have to recommend a solid month in Japan. Away from any undue stimulation. And I'm afraid, Lieutenant, that includes you.
- 'Tank' Martin: Alla tua salute.
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: You do speak Italian.
- 'Tank' Martin: Well, just enough to get my face slapped.
- 'Tank' Martin: Why do I have the distinct impression I have been the subject of a bit of character assassination?
- Juiletta 'Julie' Peroni: There's been some... target practice.
- 'Tank' Martin: Well, I don't know what was said, but, I can assure you that when it comes to the fairer sex, my behavior has always been respectful, considerate and totally lecherous.
- Bob Hope, Himself - USO Christmas Show: You know, we'd have never found this place if we didn't get lost. And please, we don't want too much applause here. I'd hate to be held over.
- 'Tank' Martin: This war is gettin' out of hand. I swear, all that people think about is fight, fight, fight.
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: Captain Phillips. He's awfully sweet, but...
- Tom Ferris: But, you've got to go!
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: Not with busy fingers Phillips.
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: Oh, Tank, Tank. You - you haven't changed a bit. You and - and Cary Grant.
- Tom Ferris: If he only had my charm.
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: [at the beach, two young girls walk by] If you want to go and play, don't feel you're stuck here with Mamma.
- 'Tank' Martin: No, I'll stay with Mamma.
- [sees Julie putting on suntan lotion]
- 'Tank' Martin: Mamma Mia!
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: I bought this suit for my husband.
- 'Tank' Martin: It'll never fit him.
- Tom Ferris: Forty-two below zero. I'm up there beating my shorts with a stick, while you're down here cuddling up with this aging white poacher!
- Tom Ferris: I've been having an affair with a little black book, sir. It's about time I had one with my wife!
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: Put your bottle on the table.
- 'Tank' Martin: If he puts the girl on the table.
- Tom Ferris: If you put the cigars on the table.
- Julietta 'Julie' Ferris: Alright. Alright.
- Tom Ferris: You know what you are? You're pathetic. You got to knock off every female in sight just to prove you're not over the hill.