The Great Race (1965)
Tony Curtis: The Great Leslie
Photos
Quotes
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[On a melting iceberg]
Leslie : [measures the base] 37 inches to go.
Fate : Oh, 37 inches to go. Huzzah! At the rate we've been melting, that's good for about one more week!
Leslie : You'd better keep it to yourself.
Fate : Oh, of course I'll keep it to myself.
[Leslie walks away]
Fate : [muttering] Until the water reaches my lower lip, and then I'm gonna mention it to SOMEBODY!
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Maggie DuBois : And because I consider myself sexually free and morally emancipated, I am still a responsible, discriminating woman who does not intend to jump into bed with the first wavy-haired, muscle-bound, egocentric male who thinks he can seduce me by agreeing with some of the things I believe in.
Leslie : I only wanted to kiss you!
Maggie DuBois : Why?
Leslie : Because I love you, that's why!
Maggie DuBois : Ha!
Leslie : You don't believe me, huh?
Maggie DuBois : I do not!
[Leslie stops the car, inches from the finish line]
Maggie DuBois : What are you doing?
Leslie : Proving that I love you.
Maggie DuBois : But you'll lose the race!
Leslie : Can you think of a better way to prove it?
[Leslie kisses Maggie]
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Professor Fate : [having beaten Leslie] I am king! I am the king!
[sees Leslie and Maggie kissing]
Professor Fate : No, I'm not!
Max : What?
Professor Fate : I didn't beat him, he let me win! I can't win this way! I can only win one way, MY way! He let me win!
[angrily climbs on Leslie's car]
Professor Fate : You cheated! Cheated! I hate you! I refuse to accept! I won't win any way but my way! You've ruined my reputation, do you hear? You I hate! You and your hair that's always combed, your suit that's always white, your car that's always clean! I refuse to accept! I challenge you to another race!
[crowd cheers]
Leslie : Get off my hood!
Professor Fate : Another race!
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Leslie : It's just that you bear an uncanny resemblance to someone we both know.
Prince Hapnick : Someone who looks like me?
Leslie : Yes, sir.
Prince Hapnick : [laughing, then comes silent pause] Poor fellow.
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Baron von Stuppe : Well, Mr. Leslie. I had expected to see you again, but, ah, not with a sword in your hand. Are you partial to the foil?
Leslie : Not particularly. It happened to be convenient.
Baron von Stuppe : I presume you know how to use one.
Leslie : I hope that won't be necessary.
Baron von Stuppe : I'm sure you do.
Leslie : Will you release Ms. Dubois and the others?
Baron von Stuppe : No...
Leslie : I'm afraid this will be necessary.
Baron von Stuppe : You're being very foolish, Mr. Leslie.
Leslie : That's an assumption, Baron. You make me the victim even before we start!
Baron von Stuppe : [shrugs] It's your life...
Leslie : [gestures with sword] You're assuming again.
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Leslie : I was once on an anthropological expedition to study the Kwakiutl Indians. In the winter, one Kwakiutl Indian in a blanket froze, but two Kwakiutl Indians in the same blanket...
Maggie DuBois : Yes...?
Leslie : ...Were warmer.
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[Leslie encounters Maggie stranded in the desert]
Leslie : I'm offering you a lift.
[Maggie ignores him]
Leslie : Or would you prefer an engraved invitation?
Maggie DuBois : I might consider an apology.
Leslie : An apology? For what? It's twenty miles back to Borracho, you'd never make it.
Maggie DuBois : Well, that's your fault.
Leslie : MY fault?
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Leslie : It's been my experience, General, that there is little advantage to winning if one wins too easily.
Prince Hapnik : Rah! Oh oh, rah! Oh rah! Oh rah ah ah! What do you think of that, General?
General : An admirable point of view, for anyone but a soldier. In my profession, to win is imperative. To win easily is a blessing.
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Leslie : Minutes have made the difference in survival, Miss DuBois.
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Professor Fate : [inside Leslie's car with Max] My apologies, there's a polar bear in our car.
Leslie : If you don't leave this car immediately, I shall personally feed you to the bear!
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Leslie : [to Maggie] You talk a good fight, but when it comes down to it, you're as emancipated as a confirmed spinster in a knitting bee.
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Baron von Stuppe : My compliments, Mr. Leslie. You handle the foil very well.
Leslie : Thank you, Baron. So do you.
Baron von Stuppe : Personally, I prefer a man's weapon. How are you with a saber?
Leslie : There's only one way to find out.
