- Chief Rotten Eagle: What are we lookin' for?
- J. Sinister Hulk: Anything suspicious!
- Chief Rotten Eagle: Only thing suspicious is us!
- Big Bang The Martian: [Talking about Go-Go the Martian to Socum] It's not that I don't like him, it's just that I can't stand him!
- Connie: [Talking about Go-Go the Martian] This kid is a kook!
- Aunt Wendy: No, dear not a kook - a Martian.
- Connie: A Martian!
- Aunt Wendy: From Mars.
- Connie: Both you birds belong in a clock.
- [first lines]
- Big Bang The Martian: I say, let's call the whole invasion off. What do we need with a crazy planet?
- Socum: That's not it. We owe it to the universe. If those are earth teenagers, they've got to cause inter-galactic trouble when they grow up.
- Big Bang The Martian: You picked the biggest goof-off on all Mars to be the advance man.
- Socum: Naturally. He's so stupid that if he's captured, he'll confuse the enemy.
- Aunt Wendy: Oh, you're all looking so healthy this morning! Now, breathe deeply. Because we have a nice warm summer coming, and I want to bring the color to your cheeks. Ooh! Mmm. Harold, Cynthia, not yet. I shall have to talk to you about the birds and the bees, and the teenagers. I know it takes self-control, but there's a time and a place for everything.
- Aunt Wendy: You're casting shadows on my roses.
- Go Go: Terribly sorry.
- Aunt Wendy: I should hope so. What if I were having a sunbath?
- Go Go: I'll prove it to you. This is my transducer.
- Aunt Wendy: Oh, we don't use words like that in this house, dear.
- Vikki: [singing] Girls in bikinis steal the show, Yeah, walkin' down the beach to and fro, It's summertime we have a ball, We live it up, yeah, till the fall, 'Cause that's the way it's done among the young...
- Chief Rotten Eagle: Chief Rotten Eagle never get lost. Sometimes he not know where he is, but never lost.
- J. Sinister Hulk: Now, get goin'. And when you're in town keep your eyes peeled for that Big Lunk kid. If you see him, sic Helga on him, got-um?
- Chief Rotten Eagle: Got-um. How Chief Rotten Eagle gonna know Big Lunk when he see him?
- J. Sinister Hulk: Now, that's easy. He's always walkin' around wearin' this goofy broad-billed red baseball cap.
- Chief Rotten Eagle: Got-um. Goofy broad. Red baseball cap.
- Aunt Wendy: This afternoon I'll be at my shop. You ask him to drive you there. I've got a new dress for you to try on that'll knock his eyes out! Guaranteed: date bait.
- Connie: But, but...
- Aunt Wendy: Stop sputtering like a motorboat and try to look seductive.
- Big Bang The Martian: That's what you call an intelligence officer? That's what I call a nut!
- Socum: I call him a nut too, but look how nicely he fits in on earth, chasing Indians and blondes.
- Big Bang The Martian: He's so stupid, he'll probably catch the Indian.
- Head Saleslady: [singing] Wait a minute now something's wrong, That kind of dancing just doesn't belong, In my day we never did it that way, In my day we used to swing and sway, In my day we never did it this way, Where did I go wrong...
- Head Saleslady: Do you see what I see?
- Aunt Wendy: It appears to be an Indian.
- Head Saleslady: I'll tell him to make another reservation - someplace else.
- Connie: [singing] A stuffed animal is more than a toy, Soft and cuddly and not like a boy, When you're wondering if he loves you so, A stuffed animal never says no...
- Connie: [singing] Pajama party tonight, Oh, what a party tonight, We'll have a party tonight, Don't you know it's the latest craze, Havin' a party wearin' your PJ's...
- Fleegle: Boss, I think we got company.
- J. Sinister Hulk: Well, why don't you look out the door, you lamebrain?
- Fleegle: You're an Indian scout. You look out the door.
- Chief Rotten Eagle: Time come to tell the truth. Me red man with yellow streak. Real name: Chief Chicken Feather.
- Fleegle: Well, what do we have here? Some typical, clean-cut American youts. Listen, typical clean-cut American youts. How would you all like to make a five-spot? Maybe you're not typical, clean-cut American youts.
- Eric Von Zipper: Oh, we are, we are. Tell 'im.
- Rat Pack, Rat Pack, Rat Pack, Rat Pack: We are typical, clean-cut American youts.
- Eric Von Zipper: See? What did I tell you? I like him. Him, I like. And anything this gentlemen wants us to do, we do. Now, I believe you mentioned somethin' about a five-spot.
- Fleegle: Yeah. But first, you're invited to a pajama party!
- J. Sinister Hulk: Now, tonight we're gonna have a party, a *pajama* party. That's what the kids like. And we'll get the old doll to chaperon.