- Drinking removes warts and pimples. Not from me. But from those I look at.
- [trademark line] How sweet it is!"
- I'm no alcoholic. I'm a drunkard. There's a difference. A drunkard doesn't like to go to meetings.
- The worst thing you can do with money is save it.
- [on what inspired him to became a "mood music" legend, via a series of successful albums] Every time I ever watched Clark Gable do a love scene in the movies, I'd hear this really pretty music, real romantic, come up behind him and help set the mood. So I'm figuring that if Gable needs that kinda help, then a guy in Canarsie has gotta be dyin' for something like this.
- I have no use for humility. I am a fellow with an exceptional talent.
- Always ended his show with the "The Miami Beach audience is the greatest audience in the world."
- [on having plastic surgery] I felt I owed it to the audience. They see some decrepit-looking fellow doing a lot of running around, and they get worried. I do strenuous physical things onstage and I don't want them worrying about me. With Bob Hope, I'm worried every time I see him walk onstage ... I had a month off, and I just did it. Of course, it is quite a decision to make when you're 61 years old. How do you know if you're physically able to stand up under it? And with all the work I have coming up, if anything had happened, God forbid, it would have been a disaster. But the main thing was to get the best possible doctor to do the job, and I did.
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