Tv diary ‘22
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- CreatorDaniel AbrahamMark FergusTy FranckStarsSteven StraitDominique TipperWes ChathamThe disappearance of rich-girl-turned-political-activist links the lives of Ceres detective, accidental ship captain and U.N. politician. Amidst political tension between Earth, Mars and the Belt, they unravel the greatest conspiracy.It’s a credit to the writers that season 6, which jams a big old book into six tight episodes, only occasionally feels rushed
- CreatorJohn BloomAustin JenningsMatt ManjouridesStarsJohn BloomDiana PrinceJohn Patrick BrennanJoe Bob is back! Watching B-Movies and giving background and behind the scenes information. He watches Tourist Trap, Re-Animator and much much more.Miscellaneous catch up, Valentine’s special, season 4 upcoming
- CreatorJames GunnStarsJohn CenaDanielle BrooksFreddie StromaPicking up where The Suicide Squad (2021) left off, Peacemaker returns home after recovering from his encounter with Bloodsport - only to discover that his freedom comes at a price.Premiere. Slackly paced episode finds James Gunn at his most self-indulgent, and honestly doesn’t seem to promise much room for improvement. Peacemaker is a fun foil to the rest of the team in The Suicide Squad, a cheerfully deranged bigot who fancies himself a hero. But after his heel turn and satisfying comeuppance, he’s just about the last character who we need or want more of. Thus far, Cena and Gunn have failed to make a convincing counter argument. Best part is the titles, with the cast dancing to “Do Ya Wanna Taste It”, though this too rings a bit hollow, strongly recalling the titles of Gunn’s prior feature “Super”.
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Ok, maybe it’s pilot jitters. Maybe it’s me. But I liked it much more by episode 2.
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And in the end, the reservations returned. It errs on the side of being too wacky. I dunno, this isn’t a fresh impression, as I finished the season months ago. Back in February, looks like, and it’s June now. It errs also in buying into Peacemaker’s bullshit a bit too much, and letting him off the hook for being a racist single-minded murderer. Oh well. I’m watching the next season anyhow. - CreatorBen EdlundStarsTownsend ColemanMicky DolenzRob PaulsenAn invulnerable, somewhat dim, superhero protects The City from all manner of evil-doers.Nflix didn’t have season 3 on dvd many moons ago when I watched 1&2. But now it’s streaming… somewhere out there. Why should I tell you where? So I’m watching.
- CreatorGreg BerlantiSera GambleStarsPenn BadgleyVictoria PedrettiTati GabrielleA dangerously charming, intensely obsessive young man goes to extreme measures to insert himself into the lives of those he is transfixed by.season 2
Penn Badgley is very very good. Good enough to keep this show centered as the plot rapidly and increasingly gets in the way of the story.
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And after a break, on to season 3 - CreatorJoss WhedonStarsSarah Michelle GellarNicholas BrendonAlyson HanniganA young woman, destined to slay vampires, demons and other infernal creatures, deals with her life fighting evil, with the help of her friends.Season 1 continued
And now, season 2. - CreatorKyle HunterHoward OvermanAriel ShaffirStarsJosh HutchersonEliza CoupeDerek WilsonJosh Futturman, a janitor by day and a gamer by night, is recruited by mysterious visitors to travel through time to prevent the extinction of humanity.Pilot. Dumb winking variation on The Last Starfighter from producer Seth Rogen. And that’s not some kind of subtle wink either: Josh Futturman name checks that movie specifically when characters from his favorite video game appear in his bedroom while he’s masturbating, hailing him as the fore-ordained savior of humanity. No, subtle is not in this show’s wheelhouse, which is why the image takes on an aggressively saturated golden tone the moment the trio hops back in time to the 60’s, and why the big bad in the game is obviously Josh’s boss.
- CreatorRon LeavittMichael G. MoyeStarsEd O'NeillChristina ApplegateKatey SagalAl is the quintessential working class dad. Peggy, his wife, always wants more from him. With their children, they go through the highs and lows of ordinary life.“Ride Scare”
This show is a known quantity. - CreatorDick WolfStarsMariska HargitayChristopher MeloniIce-TThis series follows the Special Victims Unit, a specially trained squad of detectives in the New York City Police Department that investigate sexually related crimes.This is on the tv a lot.
- CreatorDan HarmonStarsJoel McHaleDanny PudiDonald GloverA suspended lawyer is forced to enroll in a community college with an eccentric staff and student body.Basic Lupine Urology. I have been subjected to an ungodly amount of Law and Order lately, and so I felt this parody of the form was called for. It really hits all the right beats, and even has very on point casting, with Eddie Pepitone in the opening as a very Nu Yawk-ish janitor and Leslie Hendrix as a medical examiner but for plants.
- CreatorCharlie DayMegan GanzRob McElhenneyStarsRob McElhenneyCharlotte NicdaoAshly BurchThe head of a successful video game design company and his troubled staff struggle to keep their hit game 'Mythic Quest' on top.Feh. The video game industry is ripe for satire. A better satire than this, at that, preferably much less gentle. And that is a thing you might not soon see on an overpriced streaming platform from a gigantic tech company. Points for Rob McElhanney’s Jack Dorsey beard and the deference of the whole industry to 14 year old YouTuber called Pootie Shoe, but no cigar.
- CreatorJoe PosnerEzra KleinStarsEstelle CaswellSamira WileyMaria BelloA documentary series that looks to explore the big questions of today.This, too, is often on the television.
- CreatorTony BasgallopStarsLauren AmbroseToby KebbellNell Tiger FreeA Philadelphia couple are in mourning after an unspeakable tragedy creates a rift in their marriage and opens a door for a mysterious force to enter their home.Season 1
good show. Simple creepy title sequence. Very complex, layered performances. Our point of view character, Sean the husband, is prickly and unlikable, a snooty professional gourmet, deeply devoted to his wife, who instantly and with good reason distrusts the nanny she’s hired to look after their son. Nell Tiger Free, Marcella Baratheon from Game of Thrones, is the titular servant, a meek Midwestern girl, pious, plain, and slipperily deceitful, with a head brimming full of unguessable passions. The wife, Dorothy Turner, is played by Lauren Ambrose from Six Feet Under, and it is a revelatory performance of a very performative character. Dorothy is a journalist, often seen on tv’s in the Turner house reporting on location, and even at home she is bright-eyed and sanguine, with a mask of a smile that occasionally freezes in the face of remembered tragedy and only rarely slips to give us glimpses of the pain inside her. There’s a blue-blooded coldness to the Turners: Sean the artiste, who has no need for social graces; ebullient Dorothy, who’s warmth and kindness radiate from a center of selfish self-regard; and Dorothy’s brother Julian, a boozing, blustering little boy in a business suit, played by Ron Weasley himself.
…and yet, 6 or 7 episodes in and I can hardly be bothered to give a shit. Maybe that’s not entirely a reading on the quality of the show: the planet is fucked, fascists are on the march, and nothing fucking matters, so who gives a shit about anything? - StarsGordon RamsayNyesha ArringtonRichard BlaisGordon Ramsay, Nyesha Arrington, and Richard Blais compete together on what is the next evolution in cooking competitions.This too is often on the tv, and if this point needs clarification, let it be said that that is in no way, shape or form an endorsement.
Deeply gimmicky and convoluted cooking competition, perhaps inspired by Netflix’ horror hit El Hoyo with its remorselessly punctual food elevator. It pairs glowering Scottish ogre Gordon Ramsay with an attitudinal girlboss and a chef bro with sculpted hair. Fuck this shit to death, please. - StarsJohn KassirElizabeth HannaDavid HemblenThe popular cult horror comic books from the 1950s are adapted in this cartoon anthology series.Pilot. Not a fan. Far too squeaky clean for a Tales from the Crypt spin-off.
- CreatorBrendan HuntJoe KellyBill LawrenceStarsJason SudeikisHannah WaddinghamJeremy SwiftAmerican college football coach Ted Lasso heads to London to manage AFC Richmond, a struggling English Premier League soccer team.Continuing season 1.
- StarsAurora PerrineauDiane SellersDylan ArnoldA horror anthology series with each episode inspired by a holiday.“Good Boy” with Judy Greer
- CreatorChristopher MillerStarsTiffany HaddishSam RichardsonZoë ChaoWhen a high school reunion's afterparty ends in a death, everyone is a suspect. A detective grills the former classmates one by one, uncovering potential motives as each tells their version of the story - culminating in the shocking truth.Lays on its conceit with a bit too heavy a hand, that every episode is like a different movie with a distinct style and point of view. You don’t have to say that in dialog, you can just, y’know, do it. Underlining this structure takes away a bit of the fun; maybe Tim Apple thought audiences would be too stupid to understand the premise unless the show had a funny lady on hand to explain it in plain English. That’s right Timtom Applefucker: everything is your fault. And Haddish, not one to disappear into a role, is a bit too looney to anchor the show, both on the page and in her performance.
To be continued. - CreatorJonathan NolanStarsJim CaviezelTaraji P. HensonKevin ChapmanAn ex-CIA agent and a wealthy programmer save lives via a surveillance AI that sends them the identities of civilians involved in impending crimes. However, the details of the crimes, including the civilians' roles, are left a mystery.Picking up at the start of season 4 after a bit of a break.
- CreatorDan HarmonJustin RoilandStarsChris ParnellSpencer GrammerSarah ChalkeThe fractured domestic lives of a nihilistic mad scientist and his anxious grandson are further complicated by their inter-dimensional misadventures.Episode from season 2 with Jerryboree and Fart. Man this show used to be pretty good. Less consistent in quality lately, and I wanna say never this great.
- CreatorMitra JouhariAlyssa StonohaSandy HonigStarsSandy HonigMitra JouhariAlyssa StonohaThree homemakers live in a wealthy Connecticut suburb that exists outside the reality of the rest of the world.This was on. Adult Swim gonna Adult Swim I guess.
- DirectorMichael FrescoStarsJustine LupeTyler LabineRupert GrintCenters on Clyde, a meek, unassuming fast food worker who decides to become a super hero.Gonna watch this. Gonna, for sure. Unless it vanishes from the internet or what have you. Then I will not be seeing it.
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And it has been seen. Verily, it is another Greg Garcia show, mawkish and mean in equal measure. Also very much in the vein of Garcia’s “My Name Is Earl”, about a hapless do-gooder doing good for its own sake. Not my bag. - StarsCiara BaxendaleDan CohenJodie ComerSet in the mid-90s at the height of Cool Britannia, a drama based on real diaries takes an honest look at teenage life through the eyes of funny, music-mad RaeThe finale of series 1 finds the show at its weakest, with a cliched It’s a Wonderful Life plot and a wedding where multiple characters take the microphone to make big public confessions.
- CreatorLuke PearsonStephanie SimpsonKurt MuellerStarsBella RamseyAmeerah FalzonOliver NelsonA fearless blue-haired girl named Hilda leaves the forest to go to town and find new friends, great adventures, magic and mysterious creatures who might be dangerous.Very charming, gentle fantasia, with young Hilda and her deerfox, and often her mum, meeting and often befriending, though not always so easily, all manner of strange denizens of the remote Scandinavian forest they call home.
- CreatorMark FrostDavid LynchStarsKyle MacLachlanSheryl LeeMichael HorsePicks up 25 years after the inhabitants of a quaint northwestern town are stunned when their homecoming queen is murdered.Two part premiere. Showtime preview.
- StarsNick HawkBrace LandVin ArmaniReality television series that shows an uncensored look at the life of Las Vegas gigolos.S1E2, prurient interest. Though I guess saying that you watched Gigolos out of prurient interests is about as redundant as it gets.
On one hand, this is porn. It’s quite simply nothing else, and yet it is also utterly undistinguishable from any other piece of “reality tv” garbage. So, logically we must conclude that reality tv is all porn, only perhaps with the salacious bits excluded. Further, we can deduce that reality itself is a great big pornographic extravaganza. You see, star? You are so money, and you didn’t even know it. You are a rock star, and perforce must get your game on; get paid. The cat’s in the cradle with the silver spoon, and the little boy blew the man in the moon. - CreatorDavid HoldenStarsEmily OsmentJonathan SadowskiAimee CarreroA well-off young tech entrepreneur hires a feisty young food blogger to be his personal chef.Dire millennial sitcom for an audience barely aged out of Disney Channel fare, with Haley Joel’s baby sister and an Elon Musk type.
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Haley Joel’s coattail-riding baby sister has a new dire millennial sitcom now, actually. It’s called “Pretty Smart”, and the premise is, get this, that she is a college educated woman of apparently above average intelligence, and yet, she is not a total uggo. What WILL they think of next, eh? - CreatorLauren GussisStarsDallas RobertsDebby RyanChristopher GorhamA disgraced, dissatisfied civil lawyer-turned-beauty pageant coach takes on a vengeful, bullied teenager as his client and has no idea what he's about to unleash upon the world.Pilot. Again. Not a good show. Broad, stupid, lowest common denominator trash. And yet. And yet.
- CreatorNate StevensonStarsAimee CarreroMarcus ScribnerKaren FukuharaShe-Ra, Princess of Power, leads a rebellion to free her land of Etheria from the monstrous invaders the Horde.
- DirectorHae Young JungYoung Kyun ParkJhonen VasquezStarsRichard Steven HorvitzRikki SimonsAndy BermanZIM discovers his almighty leaders never had any intention of coming to Earth and he loses confidence in himself for the first time in his life, which is the big break his human nemesis, Dib has been waiting for.Wasn’t paying my undivided attention but enjoyed it a bit more on rewatch here.
- CreatorZack StentzStarsPaul-Mikél WilliamsKausar MohammedRaini RodriguezSix teens attending an adventure camp on the opposite side of Isla Nublar must band together to survive when dinosaurs wreak havoc on the island.Okay, god help me, if none of these jerkass kids get eaten by the end of episode two…
- CreatorMark GravasBradley Trevor GreiveStarsJosh ZuckermanDanice CabanelaBradley Trevor GreiveA brave zoologist, his spunky niece and anxious assistant explore the world while saving wild beasts in this adult animated educational-comedy series.Hackneyed stuff, featuring a celebrity zoologist, the sort of guy who goes on talk shows with Komodo dragons or whatever, as his cartoon self, going on adventures with his kooky sidekicks. I mean… if this guy was going to do a show, why this PG13 “WildKratts” variation? Who is this even supposed to be for?
- CreatorShion TakeuchiAlex HirschStarsLizzy CaplanChristian SlaterClark DukeFor employees of the Deep State, conspiracies aren't just theories, they're fact. And keeping them a secret is a full-time job.Season 1
- StarsPedro PascalBryan CranstonRebel WilsonThis immersive series follows the world's most magnificent creatures, capturing never before seen moments from the heartwarming to the outrageous.
- CreatorAaron MartinStarsChristopher JacotPaula BrancatiJoanne VannicolaAn anthology series featuring rampaging serial killers leaving carnage in their wake as their next victims fight to stay alive.Season 1. I found this promising in the early going, but by season’s end it had thoroughly worn out its welcome. It’s very predictable. I guessed the killer’s identity after episode 5. But it’s just the sort of thing where you have so many obvious red herrings, and once you eliminate them you’ve only got one fish left in the barrel. Nothing in the story required that this be a show instead of a movie, and so it ends up feeling about 6 and a half hours too long.
The way the show plays fast and loose with its backstory is ultimately deflating as well. Sarah goes to the local prison to meet the man who killed her parents as a copycat killer plagues the town, and it’s all very Silence of the Lambs, but ok, I’ll allow it. But then it turns out that the imprisoned man was a dorky priest and his murders were crimes of passion, and it’s like, why are we treating this doofus like a criminal mastermind?
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And a 2
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And a 3.
Worst season? That’s a toughie. I feel like the first season is the most disappointing, because it starts off ok and so it has the furthest to fall. Two had me thinking that it would be able to get things on the right track, but it soon became clear that it was even more scattered, with its highly unlikely cast of characters. By the time I got to three I had given up hope on it ever being good, and so I was not so disappointed.
Each time around most of the characters are just cartoonishly awful. And they are worse each season. Season 2 introduced me, though I’ve seen her elsewhere, to my new least favorite actress ever in Joanne Vannicola. Is this chick this bad in everything, or just this stupid show, which makes such dumb demands of her as playing a short fused hippie and a drugged out mystic addle-wit?
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Aghhh, and 4.
Gotta say, though I’m sure the actors appreciate having a steady gig, this is not a show that benefits from reusing its ensemble time and again. I am loath to admit it, but that approach works better on American Horror Story, where every season is wildly different. Here, each season is an overlong slasher movie, and the characters are all types, and when you see the same faces playing different shallow characters again and again, it’s not engaging. - DirectorAriel GardnerAlex KavutskiyStarsA. Smith HarrisonJay JacksonParker LewisAn uncool dad finds himself changed after his son's birthday wish comes true.
- DirectorCasper KellyStarsKen DeLozierTara OchsKatelyn NaconA series of montages that parodies the introductory title sequences of generic 70s, 80s and 90s TV shows of various genres slowly turns into an absurdist meta slasher and then the parody becomes even weirder.Here’s a contrast. “Cool Dad”, a very typical example of [as] content, and “Too Many Cooks”, the apex of the form. Why does one elicit maybe a forced chuckle or two at best, and the other thrills, terrifies… not just entertains, but buoys up my soul with a feeling of contentment that few things in life do? Tis a mystery.
- CreatorDuncan TrussellStarsPhil HendrieDuncan TrussellJoey DiazClancy, a spacecaster with a malfunctioning multiverse simulator, leaves the comfort of his home to interview beings living in dying worlds.
- StarsToby HargraveSigourney WeaverEugene KhumbanyiwaIt is a series of experimental short films that envision post-apocalyptic worlds and nightmarish scenarios.
- CreatorJosh AppelbaumAndré NemecJeff PinknerStarsJames WolkKristen ConnollyNonso AnozieA team comes together and searches to find out what's causing a rash of violent animal attacks.Ok, this show is dumber than a bag of hammers. Watched 2 episodes
- CreatorDan GoorMichael SchurStarsAndy SambergStephanie BeatrizTerry CrewsComedy series following the exploits of Det. Jake Peralta and his diverse, lovable colleagues as they police the NYPD's 99th Precinct.Final season, cont.
- CreatorRyan CregoStarsMichael J. WoodardMary LambertBrett GelmanIt's a whole new world for Arlo and his one-of-a kind pals when they set out to restore a run-down New York City neighborhood and make it their own.
- StarsGabby ClarkeBirva PandyaKate McKinnonMs. Frizzle and her class along with an inventive high-tech bus that invites children on high-flying hijinks that introduce the incredible world of science.
- StarsAva Madison GrayKristen PrinciottaHannah AnIn the town of Cocomelon, baby JJ and his siblings go on fun every-day adventures with nursery, play, exploration, and learning - situations that any preschooler could relate to. Fun, relatable stories set to toe-tapping songs.So. I figure, hell, if it is tv and it pinged off my eyeballs, no matter how unwelcome, it belongs on the tv diary. The good with the bad, all in the name of candor. And so I cannot omit the dreaded Cocomelon.
Watching these melon-headed leering cgi munchkins dancing to techno songs about hygiene and barnyard animals from the corner of my eye, I experienced a rare feeling: I felt vaguely as I did many years before, when I was briefly, as fundies call it, born again. I was at a church retreat in high school, which I attended only because the girl I had a hopeless crush on was also there. Indeed, I had angrily renounced Christianity prior. So anyway, we go to a chapel where some beardos are playing acoustic guitar, and I felt a smug contempt for this trendy set up. I rebuked myself for feeling this way, and I felt then one of life’s many hollow epiphanies, a sense of well-being and brotherly love flowed through me. Suffice it to say, it did not last. And the feeling I got seeing JJ and friends get down to the sick beat of “Baa Baa Black Sheep” was a pale echo of this: smug contempt, drowned in the waters of my expansive soul. What does it all mean? Who knows, kids. Who the hell knows. - CreatorMichael Dante DiMartinoBryan KonietzkoStarsDee Bradley BakerZach Tyler EisenMae WhitmanIn a war-torn world of elemental powers, a young boy reawakens to undertake a dangerous mystic quest to fulfill his destiny as the Avatar, and bring peace to the world.Pilot. Goofy, overrated. Maybe give it another go… sometime. No hurry.
- CreatorMitchell HurwitzStarsJason BatemanMichael CeraPortia de RossiLevel-headed son Michael Bluth takes over family affairs after his father is imprisoned. But the rest of his spoiled, dysfunctional family are making his job unbearable.Season 1 rewatch
- CreatorÁlex PinaStarsÚrsula CorberóÁlvaro MorteItziar ItuñoAn unusual group of robbers attempt to carry out the most perfect robbery in Spanish history - stealing 2.4 billion euros from the Royal Mint of Spain.
- CreatorJeremiah CortezJames HamiltonAdam HenryStarsHaley Joel OsmentSarah ChalkeKimiko GlennIn the not-so-distant future, Earth's scientists send a fleet of genetically enhanced dogs to explore the galaxy in search of a new planet to call home.
- CreatorEric KripkeStarsKarl UrbanJack QuaidAntony StarrA group of vigilantes set out to take down corrupt superheroes who abuse their superpowers.
- CreatorBen FalconeStarsMelissa McCarthyBen FalconeUsman AllyA tech-support employee becomes the unwitting messenger of God.Saw a little of this. Almost made it through the premiere. On in the background. It’s terrible. Obnoxious characters in a dull workplace comedy, with endless unfunny prattle and trite metaphysics.
- CreatorLauren FaustBonnie ZacherleStarsAshleigh BallTara StrongTabitha St. GermainAfter learning that her friends, as well as herself, are the magical Elements of Harmony, studious unicorn Twilight Sparkle is sent by her mentor, Princess Celestia, to Ponyville to study the magic of friendship with help from her friends.
- StarsCarly PopeAlec GillisA series of black comedy parodies of late-night cooking infomercials, starring a hapless presenter named Bill. The products he demonstrates all end up producing a disgusting product which he then consumes, or malfunctioning and maiming him.IMDb says this is a tv show, so here it goes. Who am I to argue?
Of the Oats Studio shorts, these are pretty good. Sure, a parody of late night infomercials isn’t an exceeding original concept, but they hit all the right beats and do what they aim to do. And they are nice and short. It’s a bit like an Adult Swim thing, but I feel that Adult Swim would do something zanier and stupider, and 10-20 minutes too long. Like “Wet Shapes” or whatever. - CreatorJason RothenbergStarsEliza TaylorBob MorleyMarie AvgeropoulosSet 97 years after a nuclear war destroyed civilization, when a spaceship housing humanity's lone survivors sends 100 juvenile delinquents back to Earth, hoping to repopulate the planet.Grim dark scifi teen soap
- CreatorJonathan GlassnerBrad WrightStarsRichard Dean AndersonMichael ShanksAmanda TappingA secret military team, SG-1, is formed to explore other planets through the recently discovered Stargates.Bit of the pilot. Circumstances were adverse. Not sure if and when I’ll give it another go.
- CreatorDan PerraultTony YacendaStarsTyler AlvarezGriffin GluckJimmy TatroA true-crime satire that explores the aftermath of a costly high school prank that left twenty-seven faculty cars vandalized with phallic images.Pitch perfect true crime spoof. Lots of heart and strong characterization.
- StarsRandy WentworthDevon SmithJoel GravesA bunch of clueless kidults are put through their paces at a wilderness survival retreat to try to kickstart each into standing on his/her own two feet. There's no running water, no parents, and--worst of all--no Wi-Fi.“Reality tv” is the new(ish) way to say game show. Ok, it’s not new. “Survivor”, the first program branded thusly, is presumably still on, still enthralling the sort of boomer couch potatoes who would just luuuuuvvvv this crap, and it’s older than most of the contestants here.
- CreatorMike FlanaganStarsKate SiegelZach GilfordKristin LehmanAn isolated island community experiences miraculous events - and frightening omens - after the arrival of a charismatic, mysterious young priest.A gorgeous and very timely miniseries, this slow burner is a trifle too slow, too overstuffed, and in the end it fizzles. Lots of long rambling monologues; often well-delivered, sometimes purposeful, and always too long by half.
It’s too bad. We as a society have demons we need to face, deep hypocrisy and moral rot, and this is a show that seeks to face them, even if in the end it’s a bit too glad to dole out fiery redemption. Pity it’s not, y’know, exciting, involving, or especially good. - CreatorBen JonesDave McCaryKyle MooneyStarsKyle MooneyBen JonesEric BauzaFollows Skip and Treybor as they celebrate all that is 80s and 90s television.Actually really enjoying this show.
Brothers Skip and Treybor are the hosts of a 90’s cartoon showcase. Their less than harmonious dynamic grows increasingly fraught as Skip’s star rises and Treybor finds himself vanishing into his preening twin’s shadow.
The shows within the show demonstrate a startling attention to detail. It’s all there: the nakedly pandering product placement, the shameless cross-promotion and merchandizing, the X-treme 90’s attitude, the submoronic catch phrases. And the cartoons are gloriously cracked: the Care Bears are recast as a bohemian art collective, with copious drug use of course. And there’s Randy the skateboarding dinosaur, who’s struggling to find himself after his girlfriend breaks up with him, usually at the bottom of a party keg. Great stuff.
…and by season’s end its charms have worn kinda thin. Definitely lost the sense that it was building to anything. And the alternate history that the show lays out, such as it is, fails to intrigue. It’s just sort of like, hey, here’s a Tipper Gore type as the president of “the nation”. Here’s a old timey cartoon dog subbing in for Mickey Mouse. Okay? And?
I guess I’d watch another season. Maybe. Whatever. - StarsGrey GriffinChris DiamantopoulosBen SchwartzA collection of animated short stories that takes place inside The Boys universe.Errything gotta be a franchise these days.
First ep is an Animaniacs-style slapstick thing. It’s fine. Sentimental. It’s okay.
Second ep is dire. The laziest thing Justin Roiland has ever made, which is a damned low bar to limbo under. - CreatorValerie ArmstrongStarsAnnie MurphyRaymond LeeEric PetersenA look at the secret life of a sitcom wife.
- CreatorHoward OvermanStarsCara TheoboldSusan WokomaLewis ReevesAmy and Raquel attempt to navigate their way through the choppy waters of their early twenties whilst simultaneously kicking ass on some seriously gnarly demons. What could possibly go wrong?
- StarsPark Ji-huYoon Chan-youngCho Yi-hyunA high school becomes ground zero for a zombie virus outbreak. Trapped students must fight their way out or turn into one of the rabid infected.
- CreatorRebecca SonnenshineStarsMamoudou AthieDina ShihabiEvan JonigkeitAn archivist hired to restore a collection of tapes finds himself reconstructing the work of a filmmaker and her investigation into a dangerous cult.Finally some good fucking tv.
- CreatorJay BeattieJill E. BlotevogelDan DworkinStarsWilla FitzgeraldBex Taylor-KlausJohn KarnaA serialized anthology series that follows a group of teenagers being targeted by a masked serial killer.Play this on Netflix and the first episode it shows is the season 3 premiere. No biggie, since it’s apparently an anthology, but WHOA is this episode a big pile of dog crap. Years after the Candyman killed his baby brother, a high school ball player and his detention buddies are haunted by Ghostface, who wants them to be their best selves and not put up facades or some shit. Great. Whatever.
- CreatorTim MillerStarsFred TatascioreScott WhyteNolan NorthA collection of animated short stories that span various genres including science fiction, fantasy, horror and comedy.Starting to think 4/10 is underrated. Almost done with season 2, then I’ll tackle season 3. Mixed bag. Some really good segments. Some video game cutscene junk.
Really, this is such a loose anthology that it makes little sense to give the show an overall rating. Better to judge each segment individually, as they are made by different people from different studios with essentially no connection. That said… it’s definitely not all golden. - CreatorTommy BlachaBrendon SmallStarsBrendon SmallTommy BlachaMark HamillThe epic and over-the-top adventures of Dethklok, the world's most successful death metal band.Season 1
- CreatorJoel HodgsonStarsJoel HodgsonMichael J. NelsonTrace BeaulieuIn the not-too-distant future Joel Robinson is held captive by Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank, forced to watch B-Grade movies on the Satellite of Love with the help of his robot friends: Cambot, Gypsy, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot.Started with season 8. Gotta start somewhere
- StarsRachel AbramsLiz DayFelicia CulottaA series of documentaries representing the unparalleled journalism and insight of The New York Times.The one about the quack doctor. Not really engaged with anything nowadays. Like, what’s the point.
- CreatorGenndy TartakovskyStarsAaron LaPlanteLaëtitia EïdoFred TatascioreA caveman and a dinosaur bond over shared tragedy and work together to survive in a perilous prehistoric world.Season 2
All in all a great season. I could have done without the detour to Victorian London, which feels like an entirely different show. Is it a show I would watch? Absolutely. But I would rather watch “Primal”. - CreatorNick AntoscaLenore ZionStarsRosa SalazarCatherine KeenerEric LangeLisa Nova, an aspiring film director in the sun-drenched but seamy world of 1990 Los Angeles, embarks on a mind-altering journey of supernatural revenge that gets nightmarishly out of control.Fizzles in the end. I wonder if the writers were hoping for a second season, because it feels like the conflict between Lisa and Boro did not get resolved. Even if there were another season on the way, I would think it needed more resolution than we got. In the end, Lisa and Boro and The White Jaguar seemingly size each other up and decide not to fuck with each other. Which, ok, probably the smart move, but it certainly feels underwhelming.
Lou Burke gets a fitting end. But the other loose ends, such as they are, get sewn up in a fashion that is as ruthless as it is perfunctory. Jeff Ward just dies pretty pointlessly, bringing a gun to a zombie fight.
It’s pretty good while it lasts. Not sorry I watched it. Wish they’d wrapped it up better, for sure. - CreatorMike FlanaganLeah FongStarsIman BensonIgby RigneyRuth CoddAt a hospice for terminally ill young adults, eight patients come together every night at midnight to tell each other stories - and make a pact that the next of them to die will give the group a sign from the beyond.Unfortunately the weakest aspect of this show, by far, is the stories the kids gather to tell by firelight, and the enactment of those stories. Each episode takes one of these tales as it’s centerpiece, and only two of these tales are any good.
- CreatorArmando IannucciStarsHugh LaurieJosh GadZach WoodsThe troubled crew of Avenue 5, a space cruise ship filled with spoiled, rich, snotty space tourists, must try and keep everyone calm after their ship gets thrown off course into space and ends up needing three years to return to Earth.Season 2
- CreatorRebecca SugarStarsZach CallisonDeedee MagnoMichaela DietzA team of intergalactic warriors fights to protect the Earth, but the combination of three highly trained beings and one quirky young boy leaves the team struggling to overcome the dangerous scenarios that are put in front of them.
- CreatorGuillermo del ToroStarsLize JohnstonKevin KeppyTim Blake NelsonBizarre nightmares unfold in eight tales of terror in a visually stunning, spine-tingling horror collection curated by Guillermo del Toro.
- CreatorDavid JenkinsStarsWyatt CenacLuka JonesAlice WetterlundJournalist Ozzie Graham is skeptical when he investigates a support group for oddballs who think they have been abducted by aliens -- yet the more he learns, the more confused, intrigued, and seduced he becomes.
- CreatorSavannah DooleyWinnie HolzmanStarsNikki BlonskyZander EckhouseRaven GoodwinFunny, heartbreaking, and provocative, "Huge" follows the lives of seven teens and the staff at a weight-loss camp as they look beneath the surface to discover their true selves and the truth about one another.
- StarsHeidi PowellChris PowellRocco DiSpiritoABC's Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition is a new weight loss show for anyone who has 200 pounds or more to shed. In this trans-formative new experience, we bring the tools and tips to change your life straight to you! Each week, follow along with each of the 8 participants as our expert trainer, Chris Powell, shows up in their home and at their work to provide invaluable lessons in safe weight loss and healthy living. After 12 months of intensive guidance, their progress will be revealed and at the conclusion of each journey lives will be forever changed from the inside out. Super trainer, Chris Powell is taking on the challenge with motivation and grace -- and he's got the chops.
- CreatorAaron SaidmanStarsSuChin PakGideon YagoMichael GranattaMTV follows three unique persons in their everyday situations, and documents the problems and goals they face.Differing flavors of reality tv garbage: the “documentary” and… I dunno… the aspirational drama.
- CreatorKevin BiegelStarsGeoff StultsChristopher LowellParker YoungCenters on Sgt. Pete Hill who, after a stint in Afghanistan, is stationed at a small military base in Florida to tackle the toughest job of all: leading his dysfunctional brothers' squad.
- CreatorSarah-Violet BlissCharles RogersMichael ShowalterStarsAlia ShawkatJohn ReynoldsJohn EarlySearch Party is a dark comedy about four self-absorbed twenty-somethings who become entangled in an ominous mystery when a former college acquaintance suddenly disappears.On season 2. Not super hurried, but I guess I better watch it before David Zaslav takes it off streaming and inserts all footage of the show up his big zitty ass.
- CreatorAlfred GoughMiles MillarStarsJenna OrtegaHunter DoohanEmma MyersFollows Wednesday Addams' years as a student, when she attempts to master her emerging psychic ability, thwart a killing spree, and solve the mystery that embroiled her parents.The S.O. is watching. Sands off practically anything that makes The Addams Family unique or interesting in favor of yet another Harry Potter imitation, with Wednesday dispatched to her parents’ alma mater, where she must investigate mysteries new and old. The writers don’t even seem to know how to write for these characters, robbing all but the heroine of their cheery, chilly reserve.
- CreatorShion TakeuchiAlex HirschStarsLizzy CaplanChristian SlaterClark DukeFor employees of the Deep State, conspiracies aren't just theories, they're fact. And keeping them a secret is a full-time job.Season 2, or as Netflix would have it, “Part 2”, so called if you’re understand correctly because calling the new batch of episodes a second part instead of a second season means they don’t have to pay the animators and other staff as much. So… Hooray!
- DirectorWayne McClammyStarsNatalie MoralesCharlie DayYara MartinezFocuses on the day-to-day happenings on an intergalactic spaceship.Comparable to “The Orville”, which itself is not a great show, and often not even a good one. But the meanness of the “It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia” crew’s comic sensibility is really off putting here. “The Orville” does right to be so optimistic, though it too often grows corny, and it’s comedic elements are often forced and silly.
If it were picked up for series, it would probably need to be retooled extensively. I mean, that seems increasingly unlikely, given that there are other similar shows that have come and gone in the intervening years: “Hyperdrive” with Nick Frost, for another. Hell, the Fox network that they pitched the show to is now part of the Disney empire, and they’re uncomfortable enough with “The Orville” that they shunted it off to Hulu. Or maybe they poached it. Who knows. Anyway.
So: this is a mean misanthropic Star Trek spoof on the scale of a workplace sitcom. It has a good cast, but finds precious little to do with them. The whole dynamic is badly in need of a straight man, a role that Howerton plays well enough… but at the end of the episode our heroes accidentally kill him, so they write “douche” on his forehead and throw his body out of the airlock.
There’s not much here that makes you want to spend time with this sorry bunch of people. The episode starts with an overlong scene in which the female lead berates the largely male crew for masturbating on the holo deck. We subsequently learn that the crew is supposed to be mining moon rock, but instead they have been doing… nothing essentially. They’re aspiring to arm the ship and explore the galaxy, though they have made only half-assed preparations at best for that. It really feels like they just teleported the Paddy’s Bar crew into space, made them Starfleet officers, and largely recast the roles.
“AP Bio” and even “The Mick” are way better shows. - DirectorJohn WhitesellStarsJessica StoneJames GreeneAngela PatonOdd duck of a pilot. I’d like to think that it has a lot of promise, a lot of dangling threads that would be fascinating to explore. Larry Charles posted the episode online with a bit of an introduction. He said that he was forced to make it into more of a family sitcom than what he initially envisioned, so the episode’s oddball touches don’t get elaborated on much at all. We don’t get much a sense of what’s going on at Wayne Knight’s employer, Aggro. The janitor seems to be an off-the-books fixer of some sort, they’ve got dangerous experiments going on, and they’re presumably responsible for the toxic waste dump next to the Red Eye Market. And there are the countless appliance malfunctions around the house, wild animals running loose, and they seem to live in some sort of isolated, off the map suburban hellscape, which no one is quite sure exactly where it is. There’s definitely potential here, even if it’s kind of baggy. And Knight is terrific as usual, an unkempt man trying to stay buttoned up as a bundle of cartoonish rage storms inside him.
- DirectorE.W. SwackhamerStarsAdam WestRon FrazierAnn WeldonThe former star of a cancelled cop TV show solves crimes. Pilot episode for a TV series that was never picked up.Saw this ages ago, didn’t think it was a big deal. So glad I rewatched it, because it is just amazing. So sharp, with a part that is the pinnacle of Adam West’s career.
- DirectorJohn RichStarsStephen KearneyMark DerwinJane AbbottA town overrun by bandits hires a celebrity sharp-shooter to clean up the town. If only he knew how to ride a horse.I watched this right after “Lookwell” (I may have seen it before, or at least pieces of it) and it suffers in comparison. Somewhat similar premise, too. Pistol Pete is an actor in a Wild West show whose fictionalized exploits are known far and wide. He’s a crack shot, but he has no idea how to ride a horse, or do practically anything besides shot a gun. He’s just a bit too stupid. To prevent him from getting killed off before the show got picked up, “Simpsons” scribe John Schwartzwelder gives him a loyal deputy to prop him up and play the straight man, and that’s a thankless role that does a bit too much of the heavy lifting. Lookwell doesn’t need anyone to play Kato to his Green Lantern, though by sheer indomitable stupidity he is pulls people along in his wake: the police captain, students in his acting class, luckless passersby.
There is some funny stuff here. The opening shootout is hysterical, with people popping up in a window again and again like targets at a shooting range, and each out law taking turns shooting the marshal on their way out of town. Just great, terrifically times gags, and the episode does not lack for more of them. It could have been a fun show. And then again, it could easily have been one-note as a series. - CreatorButch HartmanBob BoyleStarsTara StrongSusanne BlakesleeDaran NorrisAfter being tortured and humiliated by his babysitter, a ten year old boy is put under the care of two fairy godparents, who can grant him almost any wish, which leads to dire consequences.Manic, obnoxious cartoon
- CreatorLisa JoyJonathan NolanStarsEvan Rachel WoodJeffrey WrightEd HarrisAt the intersection of the near future and the reimagined past, waits a world in which every human appetite can be indulged without consequence.That dumb cunt David Zaslav is yanking this off his old Maxipad, so I’m gonna try to marathon it before it disappears forever. What a stupid bitch.
- CreatorDarcy FowlerSeth KirschnerKieran VallaStarsAubrey PlazaLucy DeVitoDanny DeVitoAfter being impregnated by the Devil, a reluctant mother and her Antichrist daughter attempt to live an ordinary life in Delaware.
- CreatorDean BakopoulosChristina LeeAlissa NuttingStarsCristin MiliotiBilly MagnussenRay RomanoA young woman, on the run after 10 years in a suffocating marriage to a tech billionaire, suddenly realizes that her husband has implanted a revolutionary monitoring device in her brain that allows him to track her every move.One episode into this and two into Westworld (never got a chance to see Raised by Wolves) before stupid Discovery honcho David Zaslav wiped them off his big soggy maxpad. Stupid fuckass.
No no, I’m not bitter about it or anything, - CreatorTravis BennettLionel BoyceTyler the CreatorStarsTyler the CreatorDavon WilsonLionel BoyceSketch comedy performed by Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All, as well as reality-TV segments featuring the group.Huh. Well, it’s not very funny, or clever, or at all good. The kids from Odd Future goof around, break things, wear silly costumes, that kinda shit. All the sketches seem very first-draft.
- StarsDanny WallaceDonald Ian BlackJennifer JulianUnwrap the real stories behind these iconic blockbusters, thanks to insider interviews and behind-the-scenes peeks.Obnoxious dogshit from the Netflix algorithm. After all, it’s much cheaper to commission low effort infortainment programming like this than to actually pay for the streaming rights for the movies in question.
- DirectorPeter LauerStarsPeter StormareNick FondulisLavell CrawfordA young, enthusiastic cop gets the job of his life: loss-prevention officer on an enormous cruise ship, Song of America. And immediately regrets it. He was expecting travel to beautiful destinations on a spectacular and floating resort, but instead he's a Boat Cop on a trashy cruise ship staffed by criminals and piloted by an insane Scandinavian captain who sets a course for the most ridiculous sci-fi adventures imaginable that also involve midnight bacon buffets.Information about “Sperm Boat” is scarce, far as I can tell. Alas, what good is this great interconnected world if it isn’t overflowing with bristling tales and hard, raw data about the making of “Sperm Boat”? It’s a tv pilot, I would guess for Adult Swim. And it just goes to show, not every program they’ve turned down over the years is a lost classic on par with “Korgoth of Barbaria”.
Lavell Crawford has some funny moments, and Peter Stormare is fun to watch as the unhinged captain, but I can’t say I’m sorry this didn’t get made into a series. It’s dumb, gross, and intentionally slapdash. The director had it up on his Vimeo, I assume it’s the whole pilot at a brisk 11 minutes and change. Yea, verily, may the gods bless Vimeo, which has ensured thus far that the miracle of Sperm Boat has not vanished utterly from this earth, and may yet live eternal in the heart of every man, woman and child. - CreatorLoren BouchardStarsH. Jon BenjaminMelissa Bardin GalskyJon GlaserLucy is the 21 year old daughter of Satan in this dark comedy.